Please tell me...

[Tohsan]

Alan,

Some people live their whole life in the dark and keep on running from the light.
The truth is not everyone get their wish fullfill everyday. Sometime when you get your wish fullfilled so easy that you will take things for granted. At time a lot of peoples just wait for miracle to happen to them. A mother with a 2 shift jobs still get the time to bring her children to watch a movie, thats miracle. My 5 years old son would love to play all the time and finally turn to school, thats miracle. Some peoples don't realise that they don't have to wait for miracle to happen. They themselve have the power to make the changes. This one goes for you too Alan. Have strong will, have confidence and do wahtever you are suppose to do now and just give your best, just like my wifey said if you want a girl to be you Ms Right, you must show her that you are able to take care of her, love her and protect her n give tender love to her all her life, show her n proof to her that how strong you are and she won't regret to be you Ms Right at all!!! a few years given to her for her explore to her life n find the meaning of her life, if she come back to you then you will be the one she is looking for. Good luck!!!

 

[alien]

Originally posted by Tohsan@Jan 9 2005, 12:50
you must show her that you are able to take care of her, love her and protect her n give tender love to her all her life, show her n proof to her that how strong you are and she won't regret to be you Ms Right at all!!! a few years given to her to her explore her life n find the meaning of her life, if she come back to you then you will be the one she is looking for. Good luck!!!

very well said...
show her tat u can love,take care and protect her the RIGHT way..u gotta change tat jealousy and prejudice thinkin of urs.. u noe it's wrong all this while..yet u hav done nuttin to change tat..
take this time tat she's away as an oppurtunity to learn tis..
..why hate wajas..? it's kinda stupid to blame it for a small thing in ur relationship w her rite?

i agree w wat tohsan said, if she's really meant for u she'll come back for u..
u always told me..believe in god rite? ;)

 

[boggysv]

Originally posted by Serra+Jan 9 2005, 04:22 -->

QUOTE (Serra @ Jan 9 2005, 04:22 )

--QuoteBegin-boggysv

@Jan 8 2005, 19:53 but until now also no girl giv advise wan :lol: :ph34r:

boggysv, I'm a girl wurt... b][/quote] soli, i didnt know/notice :P sorry..

 

[alantan]

Originally posted by Tohsan@Jan 9 2005, 12:50
Alan,

Some people live their whole life in the dark and keep on running from the light.
The truth is not everyone get their wish fullfill everyday. Sometime when you get your wish fullfilled so easy that you will take things for granted. At time a lot of peoples just wait for miracle to happen to them. A mother with a 2 shift jobs still get the time to bring her children to watch a movie, thats miracle. My 5 years old son would love to play all the time and finally turn to school, thats miracle. Some peoples don't realise that they don't have to wait for miracle to happen. They themselve have the power to make the changes. This one goes for you too Alan. Have strong will, have confidence and do wahtever you are suppose to do now and just give your best, just like my wifey said if you want a girl to be you Ms Right, you must show her that you are able to take care of her, love her and protect her n give tender love to her all her life, show her n proof to her that how strong you are and she won't regret to be you Ms Right at all!!! a few years given to her for her explore to her life n find the meaning of her life, if she come back to you then you will be the one she is looking for. Good luck!!!

mr. tohsan and wifey :)

i apprecitae your sincere advise to me.Thank you.
i was told that i shouldn;t blame if i decide to go on and wait for her. I tried too but it was too hard and i know that it is always my mind that is fooling me.I've told myself many times that i'll never give up it's because i can;t even let go everything i did i have for her and my commitment into this admiration.I do believe in my strenght that one day i'll win her heart and she'll accept me and love me for what i am and not what i have.

For teh past 2 years,i've done what i can and did what i have to do but my returns is not that good as in very dissapointed.That is why i felt so bad at times.
Many people has come comforts me and some even asked me to let go everything and try to find others and explore more but what if i tell you that, there maybe oher fishes out there but i insist on this fish and never want to let go because in my very own point of view, i think she's the right fish.

to be honest, i would have simply fallen into someone else which is much more prettier and had a better communication but i told myself, is that really what you want ot is it desperation?i would say is desperation because that is just infactuation.you saw someone nice to talk with and you fall in love.That is a NO NO to love.I believe love is more that that.much deeper feelings.Nobody can explain love because Love is simply blind folded.Agree?

My point is..i have no reason for myself to give up and if i give up at this very point,i'll regret for teh rest of my life.I don;t know why but that is what my heart tells me.

All i this time i waited for her and hope she'll think the same way i think of her.I may be expecting too much but don;t you people thinks that if you do so many things for a person you love, you show her you care for her,she'll at least know what to do and think about it?Mebbe i'm just ego because all teh time i stil think I can win her heart because heart matters not looks,or size,or money or car.

:) and hope you all don;t mind because i think i'm so 'cheong hei' as in talk so much.

 

[links]

hi alan,

hm..seems like you choose the smimilar way i chose last time. it will be a very hard way to go....need alot of courage, patience.

but one thing need to take note is...sometimes really, it will be getting terribly hard when you got to wait for her and then in between she attached with someone...then when she sad she come look for you but when she ok then she just dont care about you..sometimes there are gal like this.

i waited my ex for 2 years before we got an short relationship..i tot i got the miracle happened on me by in the end she dumped me for another guy. guess she didnt really love me so thats why the relationship cant last.

sorry if this is discouraging..my point here is you need to think, analyse the situation...take in or give up while neccessary..if not life will be really tough for you.

wait for the gal who worth you to wait...hope your gal is the one...did share with our sifus here if you find something is wrong... good luck!

 

[blue_hippo]

sir alantan, just be true to yr self and to her.to just cut it short
i also face the same situation.but things work out.
if the girl loves u because of yr $$$ ,ride or anything else , then say bye bye..
thats not true love .

 

[si|verfish]

Originally posted by alantan+Jan 9 2005, 18:29 -->

QUOTE (alantan @ Jan 9 2005, 18:29 )

--QuoteBegin-Tohsan

@Jan 9 2005, 12:50 Alan, Some people live their whole life in the dark and keep on running from the light. The truth is not everyone get their wish fullfill everyday. Sometime when you get your wish fullfilled so easy that you will take things for granted. At time a lot of peoples just wait for miracle to happen to them. A mother with a 2 shift jobs still get the time to bring her children to watch a movie, thats miracle. My 5 years old son would love to play all the time and finally turn to school, thats miracle. Some peoples don't realise that they don't have to wait for miracle to happen. They themselve have the power to make the changes. This one goes for you too Alan. Have strong will, have confidence and do wahtever you are suppose to do now and just give your best, just like my wifey said if you want a girl to be you Ms Right, you must show her that you are able to take care of her, love her and protect her n give tender love to her all her life, show her n proof to her that how strong you are and she won't regret to be you Ms Right at all!!! a few years given to her for her explore to her life n find the meaning of her life, if she come back to you then you will be the one she is looking for. Good luck!!!

mr. tohsan and wifey :) i apprecitae your sincere advise to me.Thank you. i was told that i shouldn;t blame if i decide to go on and wait for her. I tried too but it was too hard and i know that it is always my mind that is fooling me.I've told myself many times that i'll never give up it's because i can;t even let go everything i did i have for her and my commitment into this admiration.I do believe in my strenght that one day i'll win her heart and she'll accept me and love me for what i am and not what i have. For teh past 2 years,i've done what i can and did what i have to do but my returns is not that good as in very dissapointed.That is why i felt so bad at times. Many people has come comforts me and some even asked me to let go everything and try to find others and explore more but what if i tell you that, there maybe oher fishes out there but i insist on this fish and never want to let go because in my very own point of view, i think she's the right fish. to be honest, i would have simply fallen into someone else which is much more prettier and had a better communication but i told myself, is that really what you want ot is it desperation?i would say is desperation because that is just infactuation.you saw someone nice to talk with and you fall in love.That is a NO NO to love.I believe love is more that that.much deeper feelings.Nobody can explain love because Love is simply blind folded.Agree? My point is..i have no reason for myself to give up and if i give up at this very point,i'll regret for teh rest of my life.I don;t know why but that is what my heart tells me. All i this time i waited for her and hope she'll think the same way i think of her.I may be expecting too much but don;t you people thinks that if you do so many things for a person you love, you show her you care for her,she'll at least know what to do and think about it?Mebbe i'm just ego because all teh time i stil think I can win her heart because heart matters not looks,or size,or money or car. :) and hope you all don;t mind because i think i'm so 'cheong hei' as in talk so much. [/b][/quote] Dude, you really need to let go. These cases usually never work out. If the girl had any attraction/liking for you she would have accepted you long ago. Seriously, if she had at any point in time explicitly shown that she liked you A LOT, and for some reason she doesn't want to get involved...then you have some hope. Bear in mind she still would fall for someone else while you're waiting. If she had never shown you any explicit signs of having the idea of you and her together then you have no hope. Why do you think we use the phrase falling in love? She has walked past you, she didn't fall for you then, she's not going to fall for you now. Unless some seriously traumatic experience happens to her (like you see in the movies) and you were there for her, then, maybe just then, she'd have a change of heart for you. But because we are not in movie land...very often this isn't the case. So give up already. You don't want to be the guy waiting for her while she starts a relationship woth another guy OR two and still she doesn't give you the time of the day.

 

[links]

yea...its kind of cruel fact that...if she will fall on you, she probly would have..if she is not then really slim chance..

its really will be a painful experience to watching her fall in love with someone else....while you are waiting...somemore she will be leaving for australia...


Alan,

she is moving away from you slowly..unless things happen before she leave for australia..or else...move ahead...

 

[Tohsan]

She is single and he is bujang, they are still young n naive, u don't know what is gonna happen tommorrow, as long as both not married, chances of together is still there even though already got BF or GF, no proof to show GF n BF will be together forever, they might end up with other guys if she is fed up with her current BF fark up attitudes.
She might n might not be with you.

We just donno the real answer, we r all just play guessing!!!

Just a 5 cents view of mine i think :rolleyes:

 

[si|verfish]

Originally posted by Tohsan@Jan 10 2005, 11:02
She is single and he is bujang, they are still young n naive, u don't know what is gonna happen tommorrow, as long as both not married, chances of together is still there even though already got BF or GF, no proof to show GF n BF will be together forever, they might end up with other guys if she is fed up with her current BF fark up attitudes.
She might n might not be with you.

We just donno the real answer, we r all just play guessing!!!

Just a 5 cents view of mine i think :rolleyes:

Old timer ;)

Lets not even take lifetime relationship into consideration man. He's not even past first base. The thing is, he has got as much chance in getting the girl as...me if i went and introduced myself to her tomorrow...or any other Joe, Tom, Dick, Harry for that matter. He's brought everything to the table, the girl didn't accept him then, not likely to happen later. Why waste time and suffer heartbreak. So what if she doesn't stay in a stable relationship with someone else? Do you think its fun having to wait for someone while they are romping around with someone else? How much do you think the girl thinks of him? What makes you think she's gonna change her perception of him later and by how much? Unless he's willing to wait 5, 10 years for ppl to change, yes ppl will change, but after a very long time or some very dramatic incident. And whats the chance that after the change she's gonna like him? This is not movie land fellas...things don't always happen at the end for the nice guy.

Side note: Sorry for being a bit harsh but thats the truth and its bitter.

 

[alantan]

:( maybe i'll let g..slwly let go..but mebbe i'll wait for her..
i not sure of myself yet..

 

[ZephyRed]

Originally posted by mindysy@Jan 8 2005, 11:04
if she love u, she dont care u stupid o not , bcos LOVE IS BLIND ...

important is u sayang & care her .....


If a girl mind u poor , drive lousy car....u better forget her, if she really love u..she don mind at all ..bcos she love u not ur car & $$

tatz very true.. coz me driving old junk.. :lol:

 

[si|verfish]

Originally posted by alantan@Jan 10 2005, 11:29
:( maybe i'll let g..slwly let go..but mebbe i'll wait for her..
i not sure of myself yet..

Alan...my surname is Tan too. And for a fellow Tan, my advice to you is don't hope for anything to happen with her. Its not going to happen soon. Get on with your life. Meet other girls. Who knows you might find someone else worthy. Don't limit yourself. Go ahead and taste other wine. If after you've come full circle and you haven't found what you like, maybe you can seek her out and see if things have changed. Whether you've got a chance or not. Don't wait and waste your youth.

 

[ZephyRed]

whoa.. all family ka? me oso Tan .. :lol:

 

[acbc]

Originally posted by alantan@Jan 7 2005, 22:48
okie...
there is a girl i like.
she's super smart...really smart as in smarter than me alot...can do maths,physics,bio,chem so well 100 x better than me

and what am i?
i'm just a stupid boy.Maths?haha...until form 3 can la....physics?theory yes but not calculation?chemitry?what teh heck?i got a D..
ermm..besides that i'm only good at drawing her potrait,knitting scarf,making cards,some othe handcrafts...and most of them are girlish things

and now i'[m doing Animation and visual effects and she?she is doing food and dietics

all her friends are either super smart or smart....and there's no stupid among them..and all her friends..hahahaha.....just 100 x better than me

why i ask the girls to come in?
in a girl point of view..will you choose a smart guy or a stupid guy that does stupid things like doings cards and knitting scarfs for her?

Watch '"The Mask Of Zorro"... :P

The secret is charm... :o

 

[Tohsan]

Originally posted by si|verfish@Jan 10 2005, 11:28
Old timer ;)

Lets not even take lifetime relationship into consideration man. He's not even past first base. The thing is, he has got as much chance in getting the girl as...me if i went and introduced myself to her tomorrow...or any other Joe, Tom, Dick, Harry for that matter. He's brought everything to the table, the girl didn't accept him then, not likely to happen later. Why waste time and suffer heartbreak. So what if she doesn't stay in a stable relationship with someone else? Do you think its fun having to wait for someone while they are romping around with someone else? How much do you think the girl thinks of him? What makes you think she's gonna change her perception of him later and by how much? Unless he's willing to wait 5, 10 years for ppl to change, yes ppl will change, but after a very long time or some very dramatic incident. And whats the chance that after the change she's gonna like him? This is not movie land fellas...things don't always happen at the end for the nice guy.

Side note: Sorry for being a bit harsh but thats the truth and its bitter.

firstly i am not that old only in 30's uncle.

Harsh i don think so, life is always like that. If you are the Dick that able to woo her tommorrow, how sure r u gonna spend the rest of your life with her, half way down the road if you can't stand her typical behaviour u might end up cursing her all the way.
In no time u will hope into another boat, sailing away. Yes thats the whole point i am talking about, do what he is suppose to do now, study study n study, after career career n career n make tons of money, if he is destine to be with her, then he will have no problem take care of her.

Even if he did end up in heart break, this only serve as a wake up call for him. The whole incident will give u a new perspective n the way u look at thing also different.
Yes people do change, usually they will grow more mature and their demand for a Mr Right do change accross a distance of time. May be now when i was 21 i can be a fark up useless nonsense kid, can u guarantee i am still like that when i am 30, u donno. Same goes for her, ask any girl or u can ask your parents how do they think when they are young, how do they think now.

Anyway, he is only a young adult, tell this to any parents, they will say this is not a problem at all, its a problem created by yourself. This one is just a tiny dot of his life there are a lot more important in life then this one.

 

[PocketRocket]

Originally posted by si|verfish@Jan 10 2005, 11:28
or any other Joe, Tom, Dick, Harry for that matter. He's brought everything to the table, the girl didn't accept him then, not likely to happen later.

:lol: ...wah....put Tom on the table leh...hahahahah :D :P :P

 

[Tohsan]

in this case Tom Hakinen loh!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[si|verfish]

Sorry Tohsan...will not address you as old timer anymore :P (anyway, I address you as old timer because of your more mature comments as compared to many around here, not because of your age).

The thing is, why pin his hopes on a girl that would not reproach his love? No point lar. Anyway, i don't believe love is everything at any age. I believe life goes on and there are many more things in life other than a man and woman relationship. I also believe that you should taste every flower and view every scenery along the pathway of life. Not just plan to smell the rose or take in the sunset when you are well and successful. You can study, work, make money, be successful and love as many ppl as you like at one time. The thing is, Alan should now go ahead and get on with his life, whether it is getting a degree, getting rich, getting laid, getting a girlfriend, getting married, getting whatever. Just stop harping on a love that isn't going to happen.

 

[alien]

alan..i really admire u for wat u hav done for her..that's a lot of things tat i cant do..
but there's a lot i wanna say to u.. and u probably wont like it..
.. these few years..while she's abroad.. u juz let go of her for awhile..
try other relationships here.. meet more ppl.. get more friends..
if it doesnt work out..then u can wait for her return .. at least try..

..but knowing u..i hav a doubt tat u wud want to do it.. :(
...if tat's ur choice..there's nuttin i can do but to wish u all the best..
remember one thing..u'll always hav ur buddy here.. ;)