Hi Alan,
I don't personally know you, but i've followed all your previous post on this dilema of yours. First of all, do let me say this, you've really done most of the things in the book to be considered a good gentleman. Sure there are mistakes here and there but on the whole i think you're a nice guy. And its really good to see so many great advises that are coming in. But the statement earlier sounds like its been made out of bitterness. girls are not cold. i would assume that she isnt. I know you did a lot of things for her.. things that would have touched many girls hearts including hers. But there is a very clear line here which you must really understand. There's a difference between being touched and being in love. Just because you've managed to touch her heart doest mean that she's under obligation to love you in return. As i said earlier, i've read the stuff that you did for her; its great, heck i would be as bold to say that its perfect. But from her reactions, i would think that she has already hinted in many ways that.. hmm.. how do i make this sound better... ermm.. that she's not interested. As far as your complain to her, it only serves to make you sound worse. In her heart you're only a friend. And friends are under no obligations to meet up on demand. IMHO, she did nothing wrong.
Alan, i understand how you feel, as i'm sure most guys out there would. I may not feel the actual feeling that you're having now.. but i do understand your situation. been there done that. Ask anyone out there, what's the worst pain in love?? cheating? NO!! the correct answer would be unrequited love. Knowing that the person is so near yet so far.. knowing that the person you love so much isnt going to love you back. You've said earlier that you plan to wait it out. I've nothing but respect for that.. it romantic, its honourable, it takes courage.. but we're living in a realistic world alan, and at the end of the day we have to face realities. I think she has shown in many ways what would be considered 'not interested'. And personally i feel that you should respect her decision. You could try waiting for her.. best case scenario is you finally get her as a gf.. worse case scenario would be losing out on your youthful years and missing out on other great opportunities.. consider the pros and cons.. On the other hand you can opt to start out anew.. live a new life.. open yourself out to new opportunities coming from each new day. The choice is yours.. only YOU can decide for yourself. If you're adament on going on with a new life then you had better stop making excuses for you to stay back in the past.
Finally, I'm just gonna share with you this phrase:
"To Have But Not To Hold"
this is one of the best lessons i've learn from my previous relationships... Do you get its meaning?
Whichever way you chose, just remember that you'll have to live with.. whether its consequences or favours. All the best to you.. and apologies if i've been too direct or hurtful.
