Car Pooling
It's Harold's first day in the car pool.
They honk the horn in front of his house and he comes running out.
He gets about halfway down the walk when he hears a grunt and the sound of his wife's foot tapping on the porch.
He turns around and there she is, scowlng at him.
He runs back to the steps, spreads her bathrobe, bends over, kisses her on the privates, runs back down the walk and hops in the car.
They ride in silence for a few minutes, until Burnett, the driver, can't stand it.
Burnett asks, "Harold, it's none of my business, but why'd you kiss her down there?"
Harold says, "You wouldn't believe her breath in the morning!"
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Blonde Moments!
Did you hear about the blonde who:
1) had more on her body than on her mind?
2) was called "Sanka" because she had no active ingredient in the bean?
3) took an hour to cook Minute Rice?
4) got into the taxi, and the driver kept the "Vacant" sign up?
5) was an M.D.: Mentally Deficient?
6) had a terrific stairway, but nothing upstairs?
7) thought nitrates was cheaper than day rates?
8) was told she was a silly puss, but insisted that she didn't have a
crazy cat?
9) after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didnt get taller
girls?
10) went to a nudist camp for a game of strip poker?
11) brought her cosmetics with her for a make-up exam?
12) thought Moby Dick was a venereal disease?
13) thought that a sanitary belt was a shot from a clean whiskey glass?
14) thought that intercourse was a state highway?
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Chinese Proverbs . . . . . .
Man who drive like hell bound to get there.
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.
Man who farts in church sits in own pew.
It's Harold's first day in the car pool.
They honk the horn in front of his house and he comes running out.
He gets about halfway down the walk when he hears a grunt and the sound of his wife's foot tapping on the porch.
He turns around and there she is, scowlng at him.
He runs back to the steps, spreads her bathrobe, bends over, kisses her on the privates, runs back down the walk and hops in the car.
They ride in silence for a few minutes, until Burnett, the driver, can't stand it.
Burnett asks, "Harold, it's none of my business, but why'd you kiss her down there?"
Harold says, "You wouldn't believe her breath in the morning!"
nnn
Blonde Moments!
Did you hear about the blonde who:
1) had more on her body than on her mind?
2) was called "Sanka" because she had no active ingredient in the bean?
3) took an hour to cook Minute Rice?
4) got into the taxi, and the driver kept the "Vacant" sign up?
5) was an M.D.: Mentally Deficient?
6) had a terrific stairway, but nothing upstairs?
7) thought nitrates was cheaper than day rates?
8) was told she was a silly puss, but insisted that she didn't have a
crazy cat?
9) after watching the ballerinas, wondered why they didnt get taller
girls?
10) went to a nudist camp for a game of strip poker?
11) brought her cosmetics with her for a make-up exam?
12) thought Moby Dick was a venereal disease?
13) thought that a sanitary belt was a shot from a clean whiskey glass?
14) thought that intercourse was a state highway?
nnn
Chinese Proverbs . . . . . .
Man who drive like hell bound to get there.
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Man who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.
Man who farts in church sits in own pew.
