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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 2750492" data-attributes="member: 14320">Sir Alex Ferguson is sitting at home watching TV one morning when he receives a phone call-Hello boss, it's David Beckham-Yes David what can I do for you?-Well boss, Posh has gone out and bought me a jigsaw to do. The problem is though none of the pieces fit together, it's impossible-What's it supposed to be?-The picture on the box is of a chicken, but like i said it's impossible, it's really doing my head in now, if i don't get it finished by Saturday I don't think I'll be able to concentrate on the game...Ferguson starts to panic now.-I'll tell you what David bring it round here and we'll both have a go-Cheers boss, that's brilliantAbout half an hour later Beckham turns up at Ferguson's house with his jigsaw under his arm. He knocks on the door and Ferguson lets him in. They walk into the kitchen, and Beckham tips the pieces onto the table. Ferguson looks down at the table and then at Beckham. --David, put the @#&$! Corn Flakes back in the box!******************Suddenly, a woman at a nearby table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. And, after a minute or so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.One of the hillbillies looks at her and says, 'Kin ya swallar?'The woman shakes her head no.Then he asks, 'Kin ya breathe?'The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head no.The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up her dress, yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe again, the Hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.His partner says, 'Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind LickManeuver' but I ain't niver seed nobody do it!'</blockquote>

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