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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 4387438" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Thor The Viking God Of Thunder</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Thor, the Viking God of Thunder, and his pal Odin were up in Valhalla,</p><p>when suddenly Thor said to Odin, "It's been a long time now. I really</p><p>need to have sex."</p><p></p><p>Odin stood and pondered for a while, before replying, "Go to Earth, O</p><p>Thor, and find thyself what they call a 'lady of joy' and treat her to</p><p>your manly pleasures."</p><p></p><p>And this Thor did. The next day, he came back up to see Odin, and told</p><p>him of the previous night's events. "My friend," he said, grinning from</p><p>ear to ear, "It was wonderful. We had passionate sex 37 times.."</p><p></p><p>"37 times!" exclaimed Odin. "That poor woman! Mere mortals cannot endure</p><p>such treatment. You must go and apologize this instant!"</p><p></p><p>So Thor went back down to earth and found the aforementioned prostitute,</p><p>saying. "I'm sorry about last night, but you see, I'm Thor..."</p><p></p><p>"You're Thor?" shouted the girl. "You're Thor? What about me? I'm tho</p><p>thor I can hardly pith!"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_________________________________________________</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and,</p><p>after staring for some time at the only woman seated</p><p>at the bar, he walked over to her, placed his hand</p><p>up her skirt and began fondling her.</p><p></p><p>She jumped up and slapped him silly.</p><p></p><p>He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry.</p><p>I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her."</p><p></p><p>"Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable asshole!" she screamed.</p><p></p><p>"That's funny," he muttered, "You even sound exactly like her."</p><p></p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Mexican Words Of The Day In A Sentence</span></strong></p><p></p><p>1. *Cheese*</p><p>Maria likes me, but cheese fat.</p><p></p><p>2. *Mushroom*</p><p>When all my family get in the car, there's not mushroom.</p><p></p><p>3. *Shoulder*</p><p>My fren wanted 2 become a citizen but she didn't know how to</p><p>read so I shoulder.</p><p></p><p>4. *Texas *</p><p>My fren always Texas me when I'm not home, wondering where</p><p>I'm at!</p><p></p><p>5. *Herpes*</p><p>Me and my fren ordered pizza. I got mine piece and she got herpes.</p><p></p><p>6. *July*</p><p>Ju told me ju were going to tha store and July to me! Julyer!</p><p></p><p>7. *Rectum*</p><p>I had 2 cars but my wife rectum!</p><p></p><p>8. *Chicken*</p><p>I was going to go to the store with my wife but chicken go herself.</p><p></p><p>9. *Wheelchair*</p><p>We only have one enchilada left, but don't worry wheelchair.</p><p></p><p>10. *Chicken* *wing*</p><p>My wife plays the lottery so chicken wing.</p><p></p><p>11. *Harassment*</p><p>My wife caught me in bed with another women and I told her,</p><p>Honey, harassment nothing to me".</p><p></p><p>12. *Bishop*</p><p>My wife fell down the stair so I had to pick the bishop.</p><p></p><p>13. *Body wash*</p><p>I want to go to the club but no body wash my kids.</p><p></p><p>14. *Budweiser*</p><p>That women over there has a nice body, budweiser face so ugly?</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">~~~~~~~~</span></strong></p><p>A brunette, a red head, and a blonde were having a very interesting</p><p>conversation and it got around to their daughters. The brunette said, "I</p><p>went in my daughter's room the other day and found a pack of cigarettes,</p><p>I didn't even know she smoked!" The red head said, "I went in my</p><p>daughter's room and found a half-empty bottle of vodka! I didn't even</p><p>know she drank!" Then the blonde burst out and said, "I went in my</p><p>daughter's room and found a pack of condoms, half-empty, I didn't even</p><p>know she had a penis!"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 4387438, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Thor The Viking God Of Thunder[/COLOR][/B] Thor, the Viking God of Thunder, and his pal Odin were up in Valhalla, when suddenly Thor said to Odin, "It's been a long time now. I really need to have sex." Odin stood and pondered for a while, before replying, "Go to Earth, O Thor, and find thyself what they call a 'lady of joy' and treat her to your manly pleasures." And this Thor did. The next day, he came back up to see Odin, and told him of the previous night's events. "My friend," he said, grinning from ear to ear, "It was wonderful. We had passionate sex 37 times.." "37 times!" exclaimed Odin. "That poor woman! Mere mortals cannot endure such treatment. You must go and apologize this instant!" So Thor went back down to earth and found the aforementioned prostitute, saying. "I'm sorry about last night, but you see, I'm Thor..." "You're Thor?" shouted the girl. "You're Thor? What about me? I'm tho thor I can hardly pith!" [B][COLOR="Red"]_________________________________________________[/COLOR][/B] A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, he walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable asshole!" she screamed. "That's funny," he muttered, "You even sound exactly like her." [B][COLOR="Teal"]Mexican Words Of The Day In A Sentence[/COLOR][/B] 1. *Cheese* Maria likes me, but cheese fat. 2. *Mushroom* When all my family get in the car, there's not mushroom. 3. *Shoulder* My fren wanted 2 become a citizen but she didn't know how to read so I shoulder. 4. *Texas * My fren always Texas me when I'm not home, wondering where I'm at! 5. *Herpes* Me and my fren ordered pizza. I got mine piece and she got herpes. 6. *July* Ju told me ju were going to tha store and July to me! Julyer! 7. *Rectum* I had 2 cars but my wife rectum! 8. *Chicken* I was going to go to the store with my wife but chicken go herself. 9. *Wheelchair* We only have one enchilada left, but don't worry wheelchair. 10. *Chicken* *wing* My wife plays the lottery so chicken wing. 11. *Harassment* My wife caught me in bed with another women and I told her, Honey, harassment nothing to me". 12. *Bishop* My wife fell down the stair so I had to pick the bishop. 13. *Body wash* I want to go to the club but no body wash my kids. 14. *Budweiser* That women over there has a nice body, budweiser face so ugly? [B][COLOR="Red"]~~~~~~~~[/COLOR][/B] A brunette, a red head, and a blonde were having a very interesting conversation and it got around to their daughters. The brunette said, "I went in my daughter's room the other day and found a pack of cigarettes, I didn't even know she smoked!" The red head said, "I went in my daughter's room and found a half-empty bottle of vodka! I didn't even know she drank!" Then the blonde burst out and said, "I went in my daughter's room and found a pack of condoms, half-empty, I didn't even know she had a penis!" [/QUOTE]
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