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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 4028952" data-attributes="member: 14320">Women's testI'm Not Bitter Quiz-o-RamaInstructions: Please answer each question as honestly as possible.1) A woman's place is in the:a) House (or Senate)b) Bedroomc) Officed) Sitting in a deep dark cellar plotting to cut a man's entrailsout and leave it as food for wild jackals2) When singing in the shower, I will most likely sing:a) "Poisoning Pigeons in the Park"b) "Material Girl"c) "I Touch Myself"d) Theme from "Psycho"3) The perfect Christmas gift is:a) Expensive perfume or intimate evening wearb) Flowers, a back rub, bubble bath, and a hand-written love sonnetc) Six-pack of Bud, Domino's Pizza, and an evening of QVCd) Whips, knives and red-hot irons4) A woman's hairstyle should:a) Gently accentuate her best featuresb) Not resemble a poodlec) Hide the lobotomy scarsd) Cover the little "666" on the back of the skull and not revealthe demon-horns5) My personal role-model is:a) Hillary Clintonb) Ruth Bader-Ginsbergc) Daisy Duked) Lorena Bobbit6) When it comes to cars, I:a) Take good care of my car and change my oil regularly.b) [giggle] What's oil?c) Think fuzzy dice are cool !d) Want a Mercedes... NOW!7) If you man wants to date me, he must also like my:a) Familyb) Pet rockc) Therapistd) Furniture8) I have a subscription to:a) Newsweek and the Wall Street Journalb) Analog and Rolling Stonec) National Enquirer and T.V. Guided) Weekly Reader9) I want to have ___ children.a) Any number, as long as they are healthyb) Somec) Yourd) Well-dressed10) My list of favorite authors include:a) William Shakespeareb) Maya Angelouc) Chairman Maod) Marquis DeSade11) A romantic evening is best spent:a) Before a roaring fireb) Having a candle-lit dinnerc) Country line dancingd) Shopping12) I want to date a(n):a) Lawyerb) Engineerc) Crew-chief at the local JiffyLubed) Anyone who owns a shoe store13) I really admire:a) My parents, for bringing me up rightb) My teachers, for teaching me about lifec) The makers of Velveetad) Zsa Zsa Gabor14) What attracted me most to you (physically) is/are your:a) Massive chestb) Tight bunsc) Tattoo collectiond) Credit cards15) What attracted me most to you (mentally) is/are your:a) Sparkling witb) Open mindc) Deep understanding of power toolsd) Huh?16) I really get turned on when you:a) Are with meb) Kiss my neckc) Imitate Beavis and Butt-Headd) Do the dishes17) I can't live without:a) The support of friendsb) Oxygenc) Entertainment Tonightd) Makeup18) If you were really depressed, I would:a) Listen to your problemsb) Rub your backc) Get you drunkd) Laugh19) My favorite television programs are:a) NYPD Blue and Home Improvementb) MST3K, Roseanne, and Star Trek:TNGc) This Week In Monster Truck Racing and AmericaUs Most Wantedd) Lifestyles of the Cruel and Unusual20) My favorite pig out food is:a) Low-fat yogurtb) Haagen Dazc) Gummi wormsd) A man's still quivering heart21) A man should know where I keep my:a) House keysb) Erogenous zonesc) Ear-wax removerd) Guns22) I would rather die a slow painful death than:a) Betray a confidenceb) Betray my countryc) Miss "Wheel of Fortune"d) Spend one more minute with you23) The most hellish,vile place on Earth is:a) Bosnia-Herzegovinab) Texasc) Anyplace with less than 40 channels of cabled) Your bedroom24) The one phrase I would love to hear is:a) "Congratulations, Madame President"b) "Ohmygod, that is the winning lottery ticket!"c) "Wow! I've never seen a woman spit tobacco that far!"d) "What we can't figure out is how the arsenic got in his food inthe first place."25) If a man was to propose to me, I would:a) Cryb) Call my motherc) Be pregnantd) Giggle uncontrollablyPlease write a 300 word essay on the theme: "A Woman's Role In theRelationship: Helpmate or Saboteur"Please attach references, a current picture, and a blood sample.</blockquote>