Menu
Home
Post Something
Forums
Current Activity
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
Latest activity
News & Features
The Marketplace
Cars for Sale
Engine and Performance
Chassis and Wheels
Exterior and Body
Interior and Cockpit
ICE - In Car Entertainment
Car Shops and Services
Toys and Wares
All Other Stuff
Jobs and Vacancies
Looking For
Members
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
Current Activity
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Reply to thread
See what others are reading now! Try Forums >
Current Activity
Home
Forums
Main Forums
General Talk
JeSt fOr LaUgHs...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Message
<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3968212" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Poor John</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Sam and John were out cutting wood, and John cut his arm off. Sam wrapped the arm in a plastic bag and took it and John to a surgeon. The surgeon said, "You're in luck! I'm an expert at reattaching limbs! Come back in four hours." So Sam came back in four hours and the surgeon said, "I got done faster than I expected to. John is down at the local pub." Sam went to the pub and saw John throwing darts.</p><p>A few weeks later, Sam and John were out again, and John cut his leg off. Sam put the leg in a plastic bag and took it and John back to the surgeon. The surgeon said, "Legs are a little tougher - come back in six hours." Sam returned in six hours and the surgeon said, "I finished early - John's down at the soccer field." Sam went to the soccer field and there was John, kicking goals.</p><p>A few weeks later, John had a terrible accident and cut his head off. Sam put the head in a plastic bag and took it and the rest of John to the surgeon. The surgeon said, "Gee, heads are really tough. Come back in twelve hours." So Sam returned in twelve hours and the surgeon said, "I'm sorry, John died." Sam said, "I understand - heads are tough." The surgeon said, "Oh, no! The surgery went fine! John suffocated in that plastic bag!"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">'''''</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A sixteen year old virgin girl goes to confession.</p><p>"Father, I called a man a son-of-a-bitch yesterday."</p><p>"Why did you call him a son-of-a-bitch??" the priest asked.</p><p>"Because, father, he touched me on my arm without permission"</p><p>"Do you mean like this??" He touches her arm.</p><p>"Yes father."</p><p>"That's no reason for calling him a son-of-a-bitch."</p><p>"But father he also touched my breasts."</p><p>"You mean like this??" He touches her breasts.</p><p>"Yes father."</p><p>"That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch."</p><p>"But father, he took off my clothes."</p><p>"Like this??" He takes off her clothes.</p><p>"Yes father."</p><p>"That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch."</p><p>"But father he then put his you-know-what in my you-know-where."</p><p>"Like this??" He put his you-know-what in her you-know-where.</p><p>"Yes father," she says sometime later.</p><p>"But that's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch."</p><p>"But father, he has AIDS."</p><p>"THAT SON-OF-A-BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 3968212, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Poor John[/COLOR][/B] Sam and John were out cutting wood, and John cut his arm off. Sam wrapped the arm in a plastic bag and took it and John to a surgeon. The surgeon said, "You're in luck! I'm an expert at reattaching limbs! Come back in four hours." So Sam came back in four hours and the surgeon said, "I got done faster than I expected to. John is down at the local pub." Sam went to the pub and saw John throwing darts. A few weeks later, Sam and John were out again, and John cut his leg off. Sam put the leg in a plastic bag and took it and John back to the surgeon. The surgeon said, "Legs are a little tougher - come back in six hours." Sam returned in six hours and the surgeon said, "I finished early - John's down at the soccer field." Sam went to the soccer field and there was John, kicking goals. A few weeks later, John had a terrible accident and cut his head off. Sam put the head in a plastic bag and took it and the rest of John to the surgeon. The surgeon said, "Gee, heads are really tough. Come back in twelve hours." So Sam returned in twelve hours and the surgeon said, "I'm sorry, John died." Sam said, "I understand - heads are tough." The surgeon said, "Oh, no! The surgery went fine! John suffocated in that plastic bag!" [B][COLOR="Red"]'''''[/COLOR][/B] A sixteen year old virgin girl goes to confession. "Father, I called a man a son-of-a-bitch yesterday." "Why did you call him a son-of-a-bitch??" the priest asked. "Because, father, he touched me on my arm without permission" "Do you mean like this??" He touches her arm. "Yes father." "That's no reason for calling him a son-of-a-bitch." "But father he also touched my breasts." "You mean like this??" He touches her breasts. "Yes father." "That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch." "But father, he took off my clothes." "Like this??" He takes off her clothes. "Yes father." "That's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch." "But father he then put his you-know-what in my you-know-where." "Like this??" He put his you-know-what in her you-know-where. "Yes father," she says sometime later. "But that's no reason to call him a son-of-a-bitch." "But father, he has AIDS." "THAT SON-OF-A-BITCH!!!!!!!!!!!" [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
The Marketplace Latest
New original Defi Advance A1 NA package triple...
Started by
david tao
Engine and Performance
original rare Rays Volk Racing CE28 16x7jj offset...
Started by
david tao
Chassis and Wheels
Honda Jazz/Fit JSracing GTwing Spoiler
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Toyota Vios NCP93 front bonnet hood
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Honda civic fc varis spoiler
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F10 Msport front bumper set
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F30 M3/GTS front bonnet hood
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F10 vorsteiner rear bumper diffuser
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Mitsubishi Lancer Evo bodykit
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F30 M3 front skirt lip
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Posts refresh every 5 minutes
How to choose an Evo X?
Can anyone tell me more about evo X specs?
Save Team Lotus: A must read!
https://www.zerotohundred.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/Lotus-Senna-1.jpg
All arguments big and petty always have two sides to the story. One might say one thing and the other another, it's a tough call for the...
RE Club Gathering Meet
Our Rotary Engine gathering meets on the last Thursday of each month at around 9pm
for a discussion about everything rotary & more...
Currently we alternate...
Recent Posts
Darker Design : Mercedes-Benz Launches GLA Nightfall Edition in Malaysia
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
Honda Malaysia Doubles Down on Hybrids: New CR-V Launches with Dual e:HEV...
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
BateriHub Reaches 200-Store Milestone, Becomes Malaysia’s Largest...
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
Been stalking for 3 years edy
Started by
dheepadarshan95
Introduction and Newbies
Recommendation: Turbocharger for 4B11 N.A engine
Started by
Mitevo7
Car Modification
Search
Online now
Enjoying Zerotohundred?
Log-in
for an ad-less experience
Home
Forums
Main Forums
General Talk
JeSt fOr LaUgHs...