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<blockquote data-quote="ashween" data-source="post: 3755235" data-attributes="member: 622"><p>Alchohol warnings</p><p></p><p>Due to increasing products liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the Medical Association's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers:</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to smash your head in.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that your friends are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what happened to your trousers.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose name and/or species you can't remember).</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, more attractive, and smarter than some really, really big guy named Franz.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing with you.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause a flux in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.</p><p></p><p>WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually cause pregnancy.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ashween, post: 3755235, member: 622"] Alchohol warnings Due to increasing products liability litigation, beer manufacturers have accepted the Medical Association's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all beer containers: WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to smash your head in. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that your friends are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in the morning. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what happened to your trousers. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose name and/or species you can't remember). WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, more attractive, and smarter than some really, really big guy named Franz. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing with you. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause a flux in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually cause pregnancy. [/QUOTE]
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