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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064660548" data-attributes="member: 14320">A CheckupA guy goes to the doctor for a checkup. The next day the doctorcalls him back to the office and says "I have some really bad newsfor you. I have checked this result with several of my colleaguesand we have come to the same result. I'm sorry to say you only haveone more day to live." The guy is shocked. He ends up in a bar forthe remainder of the day trying to decide what he should do for theremaining day of his life. He finally decides he will go home and makewild and passionate love to his wife before he leaves this earth. Whenthe guy gets home that evening he sneaks into the bedroom and takes offall his clothes and crawls into bed. For three hours he has sex like hehas never had sex before. After he is finished he is completely exhaustedand crawls to the bathroom, completely spent. Upon opening the bathroomdoor he is surprised to see his wife in the bathroom with a mudpack overher face. He asked puzzledly "How did you get in here." His wife then says"SHHH!!! You'll wake my mother..."=====When I was young I used to pray for a bike, then I realized that God doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and prayed for forgiveness.A woman walks up to a guy in a blue bathing suit and says, "Did you know your eyes match your swim trunks?" He says, "Why? Are my eyes bulging?""I told my wife that a man is like a fine wine... I always get better with age. The next day, she locked me in the wine cellar."</blockquote>

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