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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064653812" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>Label Instructions</p><p></p><p>In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.</p><p></p><p></p><p>On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping. </p><p>(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)</p><p></p><p></p><p>On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. </p><p>(the shoplifter special?)</p><p></p><p></p><p>On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap." </p><p>(and that would be???....)</p><p></p><p>On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost." </p><p>(but, it's just a suggestion.)</p><p></p><p></p><p>On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down." </p><p>(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)</p><p></p><p>On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating." </p><p>(...and you thought????...)</p><p></p><p>On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body." </p><p>(but wouldn't this save me time?)</p><p></p><p>On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." </p><p>(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)</p><p></p><p>On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness." </p><p>(...I'm taking this because???....)</p><p></p><p>On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only." </p><p>(as opposed to what?)</p><p></p><p>On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use." </p><p>(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)</p><p></p><p>On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts." </p><p>(talk about a news flash)</p><p></p><p>On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." </p><p>(Step 3: say what?)</p><p>On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." </p><p>(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)</p><p></p><p>On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." </p><p>(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064653812, member: 14320"] Label Instructions In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods. On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping. (That's the only time I have to work on my hair.) On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?) On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be???....) On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's just a suggestion.) On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh!) On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...) On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me time?) On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.) On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (...I'm taking this because???....) On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to what?) On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash) On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: say what?) On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.) On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." (Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?) [/QUOTE]
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