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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064265721" data-attributes="member: 14320">You know You Have Job Burnout When....10. You're so tired, you now answer the phone with"Go to Hell."09. Your friends call to ask how you've been, andyou immediately scream,"Stop asking me all these damn questions!"08. Your garbage can IS your "In" box.07. You wake up to discover your house is on fire,but go back to sleepbecause you just don't care.06. You consider a 40 hour week a vacation.05. Visions of the upcoming weekend help you makeit through Monday.04. You don't set your alarm anymore because youknow your pager will gooff before your alarm does.03. You leave for a party and instinctively bringyour ID badge.02. Your DayTimer/Work Planner exploded a week ago.And the NUMBER ONE sign that you are burned outbecause of work.....01. You think about how relaxing it would be if youwere in jail right now.Two drunks were sitting in a bar when one of them notices a beautiful woman sitting in the corner. One says to the other, "Jeez, I'd really like to dance with that girl."The other man replies, "Well go ahead and ask her, don't be a chicken shit."So the man approaches the lovely woman and says, "Excuse me. Would you be so kind as to dance with me?"Seeing the man is totally drunk the woman says, "I'm sorry. Right now I'm concentrating on matrimony, and I'd rather sit than dance."So the man humbly returns to his friend."So what did she say?" asks the friend.The drunk responded, "She said she's constipated on macaroni, and would rather shit in her pants."Pick-Up linesHi, do you want to have my children? (assuming the answer is 'no'), OKthen, can we just practice?Hi, I'm not trying to pressure you, I don't want to have sex withoutmutual consent; and by the way, you have my consent.Hi, my name is {name}, I like peanut butter, wanna fuck?I am a magical being, take off your bra.I love you. I want to marry you. Now fuck my brains out.I think we have to make love on the front lawn like crazed weasels NOW!I'd love to swap bodily fluids with you.I'm gonna have sex with you tonight so, you might as well be there.If it's true that we are what we eat, then I could be you by morning.Let's bypass all the bullshit and just get naked.Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.My name's [your name], but you can call me "lover."My name's [your name]That's so you know what to scream.Nice shoes, wanna fuck?Nice socks. Can I try them on after we have sex?Nice tits. Mind if I feel them?Sex is a killer...want to die happy?Since we shouldn't waste this day and age what you say we use thesecondoms in my pocket before they expire.Take an ice cube to the bar, smash it, and say, "Now that I've brokenthe ice, will you sleep with me?"The only reason I would kick you out of bed would be to fuck you on thefloor.The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread theword.What can I do to make you sleep with me?What do you say we go back to my room and do some math: Add a bed,subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.Your face or MINE!? Your place or mine? Tell you what? I'll flip a coin. Head at my place, tail at yours.I'd like to get between your legs and eat my waystraight to your heart...Nice legs, lets eat out.Hey! Wanna play war? (replies)WHAT? (you) Yea, I lay on the ground andyou blow the fuck outta me!Hi my name is (your name), did I mention I have a penis.My dick's been feeling a little dead lately. Wanna give it somemouth-to-mouth?Show me your pussy!If I take off my clothes, will you fuck me?If I told you I had a 2 inch dick would you fuck me? (if she says no)say Good, because mine is 8 inchs.Oh my God! I think I love you! Now lay down!Hey good lookin', whatcha got cookin'?Nuthin could be finer than the taste of your vagina!I'd rip out both my eyes just so you have more holes to screw me in</blockquote>

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