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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064232153" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Household Repairs</span></strong></p><p></p><p>This woman could never get her husband to do anything around the house. He would come home from work, sit in front of the TV, eat dinner, and sit some more. He would never do those little household repairs that most husbands take care of. This frustrated the woman quite a bit.</p><p>One day the toilet stopped up. When her husband got home, she said sweetly, "Honey, the toilet is clogged. Would you look at it?"</p><p>Her husband snarled, "What do I look like? The Tidy-Bowl man?" and sat down on the sofa.</p><p>The next day, the garbage disposal wouldn't work. When her husband got home she said, very nicely, "Honey, the disposal won't work. Would you try to fix it for me?"</p><p>Once again, he growled, "What do I look? Mr. Plumber?"</p><p>The next day, the washing machine was on the blink. When her husband got home, she steeled her courage and said, "Honey, the washer isn't running. Would you check on it?"</p><p>And again she was met with a snarl, "What do I look like? The Maytag repairman?"</p><p>Finally, she had enough. The next morning, the woman called three repairmen to fix the toilet, the garbage disposal, and the washer.</p><p>When her husband got home, she said, "Honey, I had the repairmen out today."</p><p>He frowned, "Well, how much is that going to cost?"</p><p>"Well, honey, they all said I could pay them by baking them a cake or having sex with them."</p><p>"Well, what kind of cakes did you bake them?"</p><p>She smiled. "What do I look like, BETTY CROCKER?"</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_______</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red"></span></strong></p><p>A man six foot four with a head no larger than a grapefruit goes into this bar. He sits down and orders a drink. After serving him the bartender cannot take his eyes off this guy’s head. He finally goes over and asks him why his head is so small. The man explains, that one time while walking on the beach he found this bottle and rubbed it and a beautiful Genie popped out of the bottle and offered to grant him one wish. He said he wished to have intercourse with her. She replied that Genies were not allowed to do that. He then asked her if he could have a little head.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064232153, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Household Repairs[/COLOR][/B] This woman could never get her husband to do anything around the house. He would come home from work, sit in front of the TV, eat dinner, and sit some more. He would never do those little household repairs that most husbands take care of. This frustrated the woman quite a bit. One day the toilet stopped up. When her husband got home, she said sweetly, "Honey, the toilet is clogged. Would you look at it?" Her husband snarled, "What do I look like? The Tidy-Bowl man?" and sat down on the sofa. The next day, the garbage disposal wouldn't work. When her husband got home she said, very nicely, "Honey, the disposal won't work. Would you try to fix it for me?" Once again, he growled, "What do I look? Mr. Plumber?" The next day, the washing machine was on the blink. When her husband got home, she steeled her courage and said, "Honey, the washer isn't running. Would you check on it?" And again she was met with a snarl, "What do I look like? The Maytag repairman?" Finally, she had enough. The next morning, the woman called three repairmen to fix the toilet, the garbage disposal, and the washer. When her husband got home, she said, "Honey, I had the repairmen out today." He frowned, "Well, how much is that going to cost?" "Well, honey, they all said I could pay them by baking them a cake or having sex with them." "Well, what kind of cakes did you bake them?" She smiled. "What do I look like, BETTY CROCKER?" [B][COLOR="Red"]_______ [/COLOR][/B] A man six foot four with a head no larger than a grapefruit goes into this bar. He sits down and orders a drink. After serving him the bartender cannot take his eyes off this guy’s head. He finally goes over and asks him why his head is so small. The man explains, that one time while walking on the beach he found this bottle and rubbed it and a beautiful Genie popped out of the bottle and offered to grant him one wish. He said he wished to have intercourse with her. She replied that Genies were not allowed to do that. He then asked her if he could have a little head. [/QUOTE]
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