Reply to thread

See what others are reading now! Try Forums > Current Activity

Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063480602" data-attributes="member: 14320">Annual Physical70 year old George went for his annual physical. All of his tests cameback with great results. Dr. Smith said, "George everything looks greatphysically.How are you doing mentally, emotionally and are you at peace with yourself and have a good relationship with God?"George replied, "God and me are tight. We are so close that when I getup in the middle of the night, poof! The light goes on & I go to thebathroom and then poof!The light goes off!""Wow," commented Dr. Smith, "That's incredible!"A little later in the day Dr. Smith called George's wife."Thelma," he said,"George is just fine. Physically he's great. But I had to call becauseI'm in awe of his relationship with God. Is it true that he gets upduring the night and poof! The light goes on in the bathroom and thenpoof! The light goes off?"Thelma replied, "Darn fool's been pissing in the fridge again!"__________________Blonde Moments!A blonde went into a world wide message center to send a message to her mother overseas. When the man told her it would cost $300 she exclaimed, "I don't have that kind of money!! But I would do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother in Poland!"The man arched an eyebrow. "Anything?""Yes, anything" the blonde promised.With that, the man said, "Follow me" He walked into the next room and ordered, "Come in and close the door" She did.He then said, "Get on your knees" She did.Then he said, "Take down my zipper" She did.He said, "Go ahead...take it out" She took it out and grabbed hold of it with both hands. The man closed his eyes and whispered, "Well... go ahead!"The blonde slowly brought her lips closer, and while holding it close to her lips she said loudly __________________A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.She proudly says, "Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them." A friendsays, OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?"...The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy: W."Little Known Sexual Facts(**) Male bats have the highest rate of homosexuality of any group ofmammals that exist- especially fruit bats.(**) Lions will have sex about 500 times with one mate. This is toensure fertilization.(**) In Texas it is illegal to have sex with a fish, in Florida it isillegal to get a fish drunk, and N. Carolina thought both laws were goodso there it is illegal to have sex with a drunk fish.(**) Dolphins and humans are the only known animals that have sex forpleasure.(**) The bonobo monkeys use sex (and/or sexual favors) to placatemembers of their social group instead of grooming. They are one of thefew species of animals (humans being another) that have sex out ofseason and for fun.(**) Sperm Whales are sexually mature at birth.(**) In Argentina, it is rumored that eating cats is good for yourhealth and stimulates sexual potency.(**) You can tell a turtle's sex by its sound. Males grunt, femaleshiss.(**) Human birth control pills work on gorillas.(**) The eagle has sex while going up to 60 mph. in flight, and it iscommon for both eagles to hit the ground before they finish.(**) Apart from humans, certain species of chimpanzee are the onlyanimals to experiment sexually. They have been known to 'wife swap' andindulge in group sex.(**) According to Dr. David Gems, a British geneticist, sex-craved malemice, who spend 5 to 11 hours per day pursuing female mice, could liveyears longer if they abstained.(**) In the past 60 years, the groundhog has only predicted the weathercorrectly 28% of the time. The rushing back and forth from burrows isbelieved to indicate sexual activity, not shadow seeking.(**) A certain musical note can sexually excite cats -- the same notewhen played for kittens makes them want to go to the bathroom.(**) If disconnected, the sex organs (or gonads) of an armadillo arestill active.(**) The ten-inch Banana Slugs of the Northwest end their 30 hourhermaphroditic mating session by chewing off each other's male sexorgans.(**) Mosquitoes perform a sex act that lasts only 2 seconds.(**) The largest living animal, the blue whale, naturally enough alsohas the largest penis, measuring approximately 10 feet long and 1 footin diameter. It's cousin, the sperm whale, gets as big as 9 feet. Andyes, the sperm whale is so named because early sailors thought thosegallons of white, gooey oil found in its head was indeed sperm.(**) Long a symbol of sexual potency, the rhinoceros can ejaculate tentimes or more during his half hour session with a female. They also havepenises that are 2 feet long.(**) Though barnacles can't move, they still mate via an extraordinarilylong penis (150% their body length) that reaches over and into thefemale's mantle cavity.(**) Female chimpanzees have been observed masturbating with theirfingers, twigs and a water faucet.(**) A drone honeybee will wait his whole life for one chance to matewith a queen. As soon as the queen opens her sting chamber to receivehim, he explodes, his genitals bursting forth like a detonating grenade.Plugged, the queen flies away, leaving the drone to fall to the grounddead and eviscerated, albeit with a smile on his face.(**) Fleas are known to engage in sex immediately after feasting onrabbit's blood specifically if the opportunity presents itself.(**) Gorilla penises are only a third of that of an average man's.(**) Humans aren't the only female animals that can experience orgasm;some rabbits and ferrets do as well.(**) A whale's penis is called a dork, which incidentally, is where weget the derogatory slang.(**) Porpoises have been known to engage in group sex.(**) Pigs do indeed have a corkscrew-shaped penis. When engaged in sex,the male's penis will make semi-rotary actions until it becomes firmlysecured in the folds of the female's cervix at which point the maleejaculates, a process which in itself takes as long as 30 minutes.(**) Female baboons have been known to engage in a primitive form ofprostitution by stealing food during sex.(**) The average mink sexual encounter lasts for several hours (how doyou think they get their coats so shiny?)(**) 22.75 hours is the current record for the longest rattlesnakemating session.(**) The female bedbug is born without any external sex organs. So themale bedbug has to drill his pointed penis to drill a hole into herpartner's gut and deposit his sperm into her bloodstream. During longspells without access to human blood, the female's been known to dine onher male partner's semen.(**) Capuchin monkeys usually say hello by showing each other theirerections.(**) Perhaps the originator of the "quickie," a baboon engages in atypical sex session that lasts all of 15 seconds.</blockquote>

Verification

The Marketplace Latest

New original Defi Advance A1 NA package triple...
- Started by david tao
- Engine and Performance
original rare Rays Volk Racing CE28 16x7jj offset...
- Started by david tao
- Chassis and Wheels
Honda Jazz/Fit JSracing GTwing Spoiler
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
Toyota Vios NCP93 front bonnet hood
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
Honda civic fc varis spoiler
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
BMW F10 Msport front bumper set
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
BMW F30 M3/GTS front bonnet hood
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
BMW F10 vorsteiner rear bumper diffuser
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
Mitsubishi Lancer Evo bodykit
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body
BMW F30 M3 front skirt lip
- Started by jeff6126
- Exterior and Body

Posts refresh every 5 minutes

help:about apexi safc 2 blue screen

need help about setting up my safc2..
engine:4g92p (sohc) stock punye..geee(wira 1.6 xli)

i try to setup my safc by change the correction value at lo,hi trottle..
but nothing change at engine pefomence..i really2...

Blow Off Sifus

hoping some opinions from the sifus,

my blowoff sounds weird lately..before this is normal where it only sounds ONCE,but since last 3-4days,it didnt sounds once but it sounds like theres once big loud sound(normal...

Pumped-Up Porsches!

http://img248.imageshack.us/img248/8067/64200717175bd1.jpg

Pumped-Up Porsches!

A ride in any one of these potent machines will leave you screaming for more.

While purists would argue that products from...