Oh ho ho ho.. I'm sooooooo gonna knock you for dissing auto
especially since you've never driven one.
Who said cannot lock gear? Drove the whole Dato Sagor track in gear 2 until rev limiter at some corners. Stick it into "2" and that's the highest it'll rev. It'll never shift down if you're in the rev range.
If you stick it in "D" then yes it will upshift once redlining. But if your car has a sports mode or overdrive, it'll be quite happy to rev to the redlines. Done it a zillion times in my old 3-speed auto.
Bloody hell, launch? I know how to wheelspin in an auto from standstill. Just a matter of whether you want to kill your gb faster or not. Even on manuals, hard launches will fry the clutch eventually. Pretty much the same for auto. Only CVT can't do this launch technique.
Note :
I bear no responsibility if you try this and something breaks in your gearbox. If something does break, it'll be very expensive so try at your own risk.
"N", rev to 5-6k then shift it straight to 1. Lauuuunchhhhhhh with a bit of wheel spin.
Autos are dull to drive - this I don't deny. But they aren't that useless like how you make it out to be.