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Message: <blockquote data-quote="bikinigal" data-source="post: 974670" data-attributes="member: 13046">who said having sex cant help in weigh loss??!! :albertein http://www.visordown.com/forums/printthread.php?t=27147 [/QUOTE=SPEEDSPiRiT]bikini's way of getting slim is = on the bed</blockquote>shankspony 04-Sep-2001 17:53 --------------------------------------------------------------------------------The Dieter's Guide to Weight Loss During Sex"The Dieter's Guide To Weight Loss During Sex"How much weight do we lose during sex? The diet literature explains caloriesburned while jogging, playing tennis or golfing, but similar informationconcerning sexual activity has, until now, been unavailable. Yet, a surveyof 206,000,000 people indicated that 96% devote more time and effort to sexthan jogging, tennis, or golf, and we felt that the time was right for a newtype of sex manual.EXAMPLES:1 hr. intensive foreplay Burns Off: 1 slice (large) chocolate cake.25 min. nonstop lovemaking Burns Off: 2 slices of pizza with cheese & mushrooms.53 min. of kissing partner Burns Off: 1 cheeseburger with14 french fries.53 minutes kissing yourself Burns Off: Christmas turkey with all the trimmings.PREPARING THE BEDROOMIncludes setting the snooze alarm and dimming the lights:42 (calories burned)ADDITIONAL LAST MINUTE PREPARATIONSHiding the sex manual: 3Decanting the wine: 4Without a corkscrew: 268MAKING THE FIRST MOVEIf you are shy: 15If you are anxious: 43If you beg: 100SEDUCING THE PARTNERIf you are rich (cash): 5If you are rich (credit card): 15If you are poor: 200INITIAL BODY CONTACTFumbling: 4Casually rummaging around: 7Seriously rummaging around: 42REMOVING CLOTHESWith partner's consent: 12Without partner's consent: 187Removing socks by violently shaking feet: 418AROUSAL AND STIMULATIONBlowing in partner's ear: 15Blowing in your own ear: 2,512DISAPPOINTMENT (after seeing partner undressed)Partner looks better with clothes on: 10Partner wears corrective underwear: 15Partner turns out to be of wrong sex: 100You don't mind: 0.25Partner wearing elevated socks: 50DOING IT FOR THE FIRST TIMEFumbling around: 4Desperately trying to put something somewhere: 18Completely missing: 126POSITIONSItalian (man on top; woman on bottom): 26German (facing each other, but in different beds): 48English (woman on top; man hiding): 15American (both on top): 1,243AFFLICTIONSLeg cramp: 36Making believe you don't have a leg cramp: 612Sneezing (during intercourse): 7Sneezing (during orgasm): 588ASSORTED ACCIDENTSToupee slips off (if your partner knew you wore one): 5Toupee slips off (if partner didn't know): 72Extinguishing cigarette (in ashtray): 1Extinguishing cigarette (in mattress): 17Extinguishing cigarette (in partner's leg): 133Calling your partner the wrong name: 50ORGASMIC INTENSITY SCALEShoes flew off: 15Expression didn't change: 0.5Room turned purple: 4Face turned purple: 78Earth moved: 30If Earth actually moved: 1,234,588Moaning in Turkish: 506THINGS OFTEN SAID AFTER SEX"I am so grateful": 15"It must have been something we ate": 15"Was it good for you?": 15"Are you finished?": 15TRYING AGAINIf woman is ready: 5If man is not: 563ROLLING OVER AND GOING TO SLEEPAfter sex: 18During sex: 546While parking car: 212SLEEPReal: 5Faked (a good way to avoid sex-craved partner): 74TAKING A BATH TOGETHERIn a bath: 5In a sink: 150In a jacuzzi: 15,269MAKING THE BEDWith partner still in it: 44 (indicates either a neatness obsession, asevere optic disorder, or a partner who is very tired).With you still in it: 97 (suggests extreme withdrawaland profound dissatisfaction)KEEPING A JOURNALMaintaining your own record of sexual activity will behelpful for keeping track of weight loss.You needn't gointo detail, just list the activity and the number ofcalories burned. A typical entry in a woman's journal(for example) for a pleasant low-key sexualexperience might read as follows:December 1st: Sex with HaroldExplaining how: 12Suggesting something different: 3Calming terrified Harold: 40Encouraging him to at least take off his socks: 8Foreplay (a little of this; a little of that): 56Intercourse (standing position): 22Intercourse (holding Harold up): 10Intercourse (urging him on): 5Orgasm: not sureThanking Harold: 3Waving bye-bye: 1Total time: six minutes (taxi waiting)Total calories burned: 160[/QUOTE]

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