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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 4458476" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Golden Gate Bridge</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Bob was driving home over the Golden Gate Bridge at about 90mph.</p><p>Wouldn't you know a cop jumped out and clocked him with radar.</p><p>Bob pulled over like a good citizen, recalling Rodney King and recent</p><p>illegal alien incidents.</p><p>The cop walked up to the window and said, "You know how fast you were</p><p>going BOY?!?"</p><p>Bob thought for a second and asked, "Uhhh, over 55?"</p><p>"93mph son! 93mph in a 55 zone!"</p><p>"But if you already knew," replied Bob, "Why did you ask me?"</p><p>Ignoring Bob, the officer continued, in his normal charming fashion,</p><p>"That's speeding and your getting a ticket and a fine!" The cop took a</p><p>good look at the Bob and said, "You don't even look like you have a job!</p><p>Why,... I've never seen anyone so scruffy in my entire life!"</p><p>Bob recanted, "I've got a job! I have a good, well paying job!"</p><p>The cop leaned in the window, and with the smell of day old donuts on</p><p>his breath, said, "What kind of a job would a bum like you have?!?"</p><p>"I'm a Pussy stretcher!!!" replied Bob.</p><p>"What you say, BOY?!?" asked the patrolman.</p><p>"I'm a Pussy stretcher!!!"</p><p>Of course the cop asked, "What does a Pussy stretcher do?"</p><p>Bob explained, "Girls call me up and say they want to be stretched, so I</p><p>go over there and start with a couple of fingers, then a couple more,</p><p>and then one whole hand, then two. Then I pull them farther and farther</p><p>apart until it's six feet across."</p><p>The cop, absorbed with the images in his mind, let down his guard and</p><p>asked, "What the hell do you do with a six foot Pussy?"</p><p>Bob nonchalantly commented, "You give it a radar detector and stick it</p><p>at the end of a bridge.</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">------------------------</span></strong></p><p></p><p>At a party a guy cornered a girl and whispered something</p><p>in her ear.</p><p></p><p>"You filthy pervert!" she shrieked. "What makes you think</p><p>I'd let you do a thing like that to me?" Then her eyes narrowed and</p><p>she said, "Unless you're the son-of-a-bitch that stole my diary...."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 4458476, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Golden Gate Bridge[/COLOR][/B] Bob was driving home over the Golden Gate Bridge at about 90mph. Wouldn't you know a cop jumped out and clocked him with radar. Bob pulled over like a good citizen, recalling Rodney King and recent illegal alien incidents. The cop walked up to the window and said, "You know how fast you were going BOY?!?" Bob thought for a second and asked, "Uhhh, over 55?" "93mph son! 93mph in a 55 zone!" "But if you already knew," replied Bob, "Why did you ask me?" Ignoring Bob, the officer continued, in his normal charming fashion, "That's speeding and your getting a ticket and a fine!" The cop took a good look at the Bob and said, "You don't even look like you have a job! Why,... I've never seen anyone so scruffy in my entire life!" Bob recanted, "I've got a job! I have a good, well paying job!" The cop leaned in the window, and with the smell of day old donuts on his breath, said, "What kind of a job would a bum like you have?!?" "I'm a Pussy stretcher!!!" replied Bob. "What you say, BOY?!?" asked the patrolman. "I'm a Pussy stretcher!!!" Of course the cop asked, "What does a Pussy stretcher do?" Bob explained, "Girls call me up and say they want to be stretched, so I go over there and start with a couple of fingers, then a couple more, and then one whole hand, then two. Then I pull them farther and farther apart until it's six feet across." The cop, absorbed with the images in his mind, let down his guard and asked, "What the hell do you do with a six foot Pussy?" Bob nonchalantly commented, "You give it a radar detector and stick it at the end of a bridge. [B][COLOR="Red"]------------------------[/COLOR][/B] At a party a guy cornered a girl and whispered something in her ear. "You filthy pervert!" she shrieked. "What makes you think I'd let you do a thing like that to me?" Then her eyes narrowed and she said, "Unless you're the son-of-a-bitch that stole my diary...." [/QUOTE]
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