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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 4311837" data-attributes="member: 14320">OverweightA young lady whom thought she was overweight went to see adietitian.She walked into his office and asked several questions aboutdieting, exercise, and other things. Her final question to thedietitian sparked interest in him. She asked, "How many caloriesare in sperm?""Why?" he replied.She explained some of the things she liked to do.After thinking a minute he said, "I really have no clue, but if youare consuming that much of it, then no guy is going to care if youare a little chunky!"_________Ramona said, "My, but you look different today," to Marianne, acoworker at the hospital. "Your hair is extra curly, and you havethis wide-eyed look. What did you use - special curlers and somedramatic eye makeup?""No!" replied Marianne. "My vibrator shorted out this morning."_________There was a young man from Mauritius,who said his last fuck was delicious,but the next time I come,It'll be up your bum,'cause that scab on your cunt looks suspicious._________Two girlfriends are having a conversation about their boyfriends when the first one says:"My boyfriend said he fantasized about having two girls at once."The other replies, "Yeah, most men do. What did you tell him?"I said, "If you can't satisfy one woman, why would you want to piss off two? StrandedTwo guys are stranded in the desert dying of thirst. As they're walking alongthey see a little shack. They run up to it and knock on the door.This big, fat, hairy, smelly, ugly, lady answers.The first man tells the lady about their situation and begs her for a drink.The women says, "Sure, if you fuck me."The first man replies,"I would rather die in this desert, then sleep with your fat smelly ass."The second man wants to live and agrees to do the deed.The second man and the women enter the shack, leaving the first man outside.The women says, "fuck me then!"The man agrees to do it only if she will close her eyes.He looks around the shack and sees a table full of corn on the cob.He picks one up, fucks her with it and throws it out the window.The women opens her eyes and asks for it again.The man agrees and repeats the deed.The women is finally satisfied and agrees to give the gentleman andhis friend some water.The man calls his friend in and informs him that thewomen is going to give them some water.The friend replies, "Fuck the water, I want some more of that buttered corn."YYYYYTop 10 signs your mate is getting cyber sex10) He is getting amazingly fast at typing with 1 hand!9) After signing off she always has a cigarette!8) After she gets off, the screen's all fogged up!7) During sex he screams, "a: \ enter insert!"6) After he uses the computer, the seat is all sticky!5) Your fax is filled with some guy's ass!4) The INSERT key on your keyboard is all worn out!3) The only 3 keys that aren't stiff are: S, E, X!2) The keyboard is moist!1) She comes home with a rubber inflatable disk drive!</blockquote>