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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 4308593" data-attributes="member: 14320">"Daddy, How Was I Born?"A little boy goes to his father and asks "Daddy, how was I born?"The father answers: "Well son, I guess one day you will need to find outanyway.""Your mum and I got together in a chat room at Yahoo. Then I set up adate via e-mail with your mum and we met up at cyber-cafe. We sneakedinto a secluded room, I upgraded my floppy disk to a stiffy and thenyour mum agreed to do a download from my hard drive.As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of haduse a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, ninemonths later, A blessed little pop-up appeared and said: "You have got aMale."!!!!!Blonde Moments!A blonde and her Husband are laying in bed watching TV, they arewatching an old western. The Husband says to the Blonde "I bet youbreakfast in bed, that the wagon hits a rock and the rider falls outdead," " Your on." Says the blonde. They watch the western furtherand sure enough the wagon comes across a rock in the path, and therider falls out of the wagon dead.The blonde gets out of bed and returns with a tray full of food.After eating the husband says "I have to admit that I saw this moviebefore."The Blonde smiles. " I saw the movie before too. But I didn't think theblonde was stupid enough to ride over the same rock twice."!!!!!Why do women have two holes so close together?In case you miss.!!!!!An old sailor goes to a brothel, where he chooses his girl and begins."How am I doing?" He asks."Three knots," she replies."Three knots? What's that mean?""You're not hard, you're not in, and you're not getting your moneyback!"She Needed A GuyWhen I was 16 I found a boyfriend, but there was no passion.So I decided I needed a passionate guy with a zest for life.In college I dated a very passionate guy, but he was too emotional.Everything was an emergency, he was a drama queen, cried allthe time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a manwith some stability.When I was 25 I found a very stable guy but he was boring.He was totally predictable and never got excited aboutanything. Life became so dull that I decided I needed aman with some excitement.When I was 30 I found an exciting man, but I couldn't keepup with him. He rushed from one party to another, neversettling on anything. He did mad, impetuous things andflirted with everyone he met. He made me miserable asoften as happy. He was great fun initially and veryenergetic, but directionless. So I decided to find aman with ambition.When I turned 35, I found a smart ambitious man with hisfeet planted firmly on the ground so I moved in with him.He was so ambitious that he dumped me and took everythingI owned.I am now 40 and am looking for a guy with a very big dick.dddA woman recently lost her husband. She had him crematedand brought his ashes home. Picking up the urn that hewas in, she poured him out on the patio table. Then,while tracing her fingers in the ashes, she startedtalking to him."Irving, you know that fur coat you promised me?I bought it with the insurance money!"Irving, remember that new car you promised me?Well, I also bought it with the insurance money!"Irving, do you remember that emerald necklace youpromised me? I bought it, too, with the insurance money."Still tracing her finger in the ashes, she said,"Irving, remember that blow job I promised you?Here it comes..."</blockquote>

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