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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 4127510" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal"> Little Johnny</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Little Johnny was sitting in class one day. All of the sudden, he needed to</p><p>go to the bathroom. He yelled out, "Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!"</p><p>The teacher replied, "Now, Johnny, that is NOT the proper word to</p><p>use in this situation. The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.'</p><p>Please use the word 'urinate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go."</p><p>Little Johnny thinks for a bit, then says,</p><p>"You're an eight, but if you had bigger tits, you'd be a ten!!!"</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_____</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red"></span></strong></p><p>My husband came home with a tube of KY jelly and said, "This will make you happy tonight."</p><p></p><p>He was right. When he went out of the bedroom, I squirted it all over the doorknobs. He couldn't get back in.</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_____</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red"></span></strong></p><p>Q. What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling</p><p>around in pain on the ground?</p><p>A. Shoot him again.</p><p></p><p>Q. Why do little boys whine?</p><p>A. Because they're practicing to be men.</p><p></p><p>Q. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?</p><p>A. One - he just holds it up there and waits for the</p><p>world to revolve around him.</p><p></p><p>OR Three - one to screw in the bulb, and two to listen</p><p>to him brag about the screwing part.</p><p></p><p>Q. What do you call a handcuffed man?</p><p>A. Trustworthy.</p><p></p><p>Q. What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for</p><p>breath and calling your name?</p><p>A. You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.</p><p></p><p>Q: How is a woman like a road?</p><p>A: Both have manholes.</p><p></p><p>Q: Why do women fake orgasms?</p><p>A: Because they think we care.</p><p></p><p>Q: What's the definition of a modern woman?</p><p>A: One who dresses to kill and drives the same way.</p></blockquote><p></p>

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