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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 4112807" data-attributes="member: 14320">A Beautiful BlondeA beautiful blonde goes into a bar and sits down next to a guythat's so homely looking, he hasn't had a date in over a year, also,he's sooooo dumb that one night he slept with a ruler next to hishead to see how long he slept.So he figures that he has absolutely no chance in the world to score adate with this ravishing buxom blonde.Then suddenly she strikes up a conversation with him and soon theybecome rather chummy. It starts to get late and the bartender callsout last drink for alcohol, then the blonde leans over to the guy and says,"Let's have this last drink at my apartment."Taken back by her request, and trembling, the guy finally utters theword, "OK."They get up from the bar stool arm and arm headed for the door, whenthe blonde stops him and says, "Before we go back to my apartmentthere's one thing I have to tell you, I'm on my menstrual cycle."He says, ..."That's ok, I'll follow you in my Honda."uuuuuWhat is the definition of a smart ass?Someone who can sit on an ice cream cone and tell you what flavor it is.uuuuu"Oh Mom!" sobbed Little Mary, "I'm pregnant!""What!? How could you?" screamed the Mother,"and just who is the father?"The daughter lifted up her tearful face and wailed,"How should I know?You're the one who would never let me go steady!"uuuuuWife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.uuuuuConfucius say:"Man with hand in pocket all day not crazy, just feeling nuts"uuuuuWhat did George Washington and Thomas Jefferson have in common?They were the last two white people to have those names.uuuuuQ. How do you turn a fox into an elephantA. Marry it.Q. How do you teach a blond math?A. Subtract her clothes, divide her legs, and square root her.Q. What did the pedophile say when he got out of jail?A. I feel like a kid again!uuuuuDo you know what Rodeo Sex is?It's when you mount your woman from behind, start going nice and slowly, take her hair and pull her head back slightly and whisper in her ear "Your sister was better than you...", and try to hold on for 8 seconds!uuuuuA bear and a bunny are sitting in a forest taking a shit. The bear leans over to the bunny and says "Do you ever have the problem of shit sticking to your fur"? The bunny says "No". So the bear grabs the bunny and wipes his ass.</blockquote>

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