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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3814465" data-attributes="member: 14320"> Going To HeavenAfter dying in a car crash, three friends go to Heaven fororientation. They are all asked the same question, "Whenyou're lying in your casket, and friends and family aremourning over you, what would you like to hear them sayabout you?"The first guy immediately responds, "I would like to hearthem say that I was one of the great doctors of my time, anda great family man."The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was awonderful husband and school teacher who made a hugedifference in the children of tomorrow."The last guy thinks for a moment, and then replies, "I guessI'd like to hear them say, 'Look, he's moving!'"aaaaaA young woman had been taking golf lessons. She had juststarted playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. Thepain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse.Her golf pro saw her come into the clubhouse and asked, "Why backin so early? What's wrong? ""I was stung by a bee.""Where?" he asked."Between the first and second hole," she replied.He nodded knowingly and said, "Then your stance is too wide."aaaaaThree guys are drinking in a bar, when another man comes in andstarts drinking at the bar. After a while he approaches the guys, andpointing at the one in the middle, shoutsI've fucked your mom!"The three guys look bewildered and the man resumes drinking at thebar.Ten minutes later he comes back and screams, "Your mom's sucked mycock!"Ten more minutes and the same thing happens. He announces loudly,I've had your mom up the ass!"The young guys have had enough of this, and the one in the middlestands up and shouts,Dad, you're drunk, go home!"</blockquote>

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