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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3724511" data-attributes="member: 14320">This guy goes for a shit and it just keeps going. He'sshitting for 3 hours straight. It just won't stop. He'sconstantly flushing the toilet. Finally he gets to the pointwhere, he actually shits his brains right out. He has nobrains at this point. He's finally done, he wipes his arse andfor the first time in his life he puts the seat down.+++++++++++A serious drunk walked into a bar and, after staring for some time atthe only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and stuck two fingersdirectly in her vagina. She jumped up and slapped him silly. Heimmediatelyapologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You lookexactly like her.""Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable motherfucker!" she screamed."Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."+++++++++++A guy goes to see this hooker who is said to have the world's biggestpussy. He starts fucking her but she's WAY too big and he's gettingno satisfaction, so he slides his whole body inside her and triesto get off, but he falls in. He's groping around in the dark and helights his lighter and starts walking around. After a while hedrops the lighter by accident and starts crawling around looking forit. He bumps into another guy. "Hey" he says, "You're lost inhere too, eh? Listen, if we can find my lighter, we can walk outof here." "Hell," says the other guy, "If we find my car we can*drive* out of here!"+++++++++++Q: What's worse than silicone tits?A: A cardboard box.Q: What's the difference between a terrorist and a wife?A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.Q: What do you Call a period?A: A waste of fucking time.Q: How did Captain Hook die?A: Jock itch.Q: What's the definition of a fart?A: A turd honking for the right-of-way.+++++++++++A little girl asks her father, "where do little girls come from?"The father says, "they come from a hard-on."The little girl then asks her father, "where does a hard-on come from?"The father says, "little girls!"</blockquote>

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