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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3587618" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><span style="color: Teal"><strong>Mother's Dictionary of Meanings</strong></span></p><p></p><p><strong>Dumbwaiter:</strong> One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.</p><p></p><p><strong>Feedback:</strong> The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.</p><p></p><p><strong>Full Name:</strong> What you call your child when you're mad at him.</p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>Grandparents:</strong> The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.</p><p></p><p><strong>Hearsay:</strong> What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.</p><p></p><p><strong>Independent:</strong> How we want our children to be for as long as they do everything we say.</p><p></p><p><strong>Puddle:</strong> A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.</p><p></p><p><strong>Show Off:</strong> A child who is more talented than yours.</p><p></p><p><strong>Sterilize:</strong> What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it, and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it and wiping it with saliva.</p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>Top Bunk:</strong> Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.</p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>Two-Minute Warning:</strong> When the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar-grunting noises.</p><p></p><p><strong>Whodunit:</strong> None of the kids that live in your house.</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">********</span></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">It's Time to go to School</span></strong></p><p></p><p>One early morning, a lady went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!"</p><p>Son: "But why Mom? I don't want to go."</p><p>Mom: "Give me two reasons why you don't want to go."</p><p>Son: "Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!"</p><p>Mom: "Oh, that's no reason to not to go to school. Come on now and get ready."</p><p>Son: "Give me two reasons why I should go to school."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 3587618, member: 14320"] [COLOR="Teal"][B]Mother's Dictionary of Meanings[/B][/COLOR] [B]Dumbwaiter:[/B] One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert. [B]Feedback:[/B] The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots. [B]Full Name:[/B] What you call your child when you're mad at him. [B] Grandparents:[/B] The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right. [B]Hearsay:[/B] What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word. [B]Independent:[/B] How we want our children to be for as long as they do everything we say. [B]Puddle:[/B] A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it. [B]Show Off:[/B] A child who is more talented than yours. [B]Sterilize:[/B] What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it, and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it and wiping it with saliva. [B] Top Bunk:[/B] Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies. [B] Two-Minute Warning:[/B] When the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar-grunting noises. [B]Whodunit:[/B] None of the kids that live in your house. [B][COLOR="Red"]********[/COLOR] [COLOR="Teal"]It's Time to go to School[/COLOR][/B] One early morning, a lady went in to wake up her son. "Wake up, son. It's time to go to school!" Son: "But why Mom? I don't want to go." Mom: "Give me two reasons why you don't want to go." Son: "Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me, too!" Mom: "Oh, that's no reason to not to go to school. Come on now and get ready." Son: "Give me two reasons why I should go to school." [/QUOTE]
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