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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3401920" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">The Car Accident</span></strong> </p><p></p><p>A guy askes his girl friend to marry him and she says yes, so he buys her a new car - a Lamboghini Countach - she loves this car she goes every where in it.</p><p></p><p>One day she picks up her kids from school, she's got a boy and a girl. As she's driving down the road, a car pulls up in front of her and they have a really nasty accident and she falls into a coma. When she wakes up from the coma there is a doctor next to her and she quickly asks doctor " Where is my son he was really good at football, he could have played for England and been better than Beckham?"</p><p></p><p>The doctor replies "I'm so sorry, in the accident he lost his leg he wont be able to kick a football any more."</p><p></p><p>The woman asks about her daughter "Doctor where is my daughter? She was really good at tennis and she could have been the best in the world and won at wimbeldon"</p><p></p><p>The doctor says "Sorry but in the accident she lost her arms and she</p><p>wont be able to pick up a racket any more" She begins to cry.</p><p></p><p>"Doctor" asks the woman, "How long have I been in this coma?" The doctor replies, " 6 months". "So what's the date?" asks the woman</p><p></p><p>"April 1st" says the doctor. The woman begins to laugh "So you were jokeing then were you?"</p><p></p><p>Doctor: "YES.........they both died in inpact"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">========================================</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Michael Jackson and his wife are in the recovery room with their new baby son.</p><p></p><p>The doctor walks in and Michael asks: "Doctor, how long before we can have sex?"</p><p></p><p>The doctor replies, "I'd wait until he's at least 14."</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red"></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">========================================</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Two men are sitting in a restaurant. There is also a gypsy woman sitting opposite to them with her legs wide spread.</p><p></p><p>One man says: "Look, she has such dark hair on her genitals!" the other says: "Oh no, it isn't hair, it is dark panties!" Then they made a bet - $100 . A waiter goes by so they ask him to find out for them.</p><p></p><p>He did so, but takes all the money and walks away. "What happened, why are you taking the money?!" Asked the waiter.</p><p></p><p>He replies: "Neither of you was right! She had her period and there were flies on her!"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 3401920, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]The Car Accident[/COLOR][/B] A guy askes his girl friend to marry him and she says yes, so he buys her a new car - a Lamboghini Countach - she loves this car she goes every where in it. One day she picks up her kids from school, she's got a boy and a girl. As she's driving down the road, a car pulls up in front of her and they have a really nasty accident and she falls into a coma. When she wakes up from the coma there is a doctor next to her and she quickly asks doctor " Where is my son he was really good at football, he could have played for England and been better than Beckham?" The doctor replies "I'm so sorry, in the accident he lost his leg he wont be able to kick a football any more." The woman asks about her daughter "Doctor where is my daughter? She was really good at tennis and she could have been the best in the world and won at wimbeldon" The doctor says "Sorry but in the accident she lost her arms and she wont be able to pick up a racket any more" She begins to cry. "Doctor" asks the woman, "How long have I been in this coma?" The doctor replies, " 6 months". "So what's the date?" asks the woman "April 1st" says the doctor. The woman begins to laugh "So you were jokeing then were you?" Doctor: "YES.........they both died in inpact" [B][COLOR="Red"]========================================[/COLOR][/B] Michael Jackson and his wife are in the recovery room with their new baby son. The doctor walks in and Michael asks: "Doctor, how long before we can have sex?" The doctor replies, "I'd wait until he's at least 14." [B][COLOR="Red"] ========================================[/COLOR][/B] Two men are sitting in a restaurant. There is also a gypsy woman sitting opposite to them with her legs wide spread. One man says: "Look, she has such dark hair on her genitals!" the other says: "Oh no, it isn't hair, it is dark panties!" Then they made a bet - $100 . A waiter goes by so they ask him to find out for them. He did so, but takes all the money and walks away. "What happened, why are you taking the money?!" Asked the waiter. He replies: "Neither of you was right! She had her period and there were flies on her!" [/QUOTE]
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