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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3295273" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>This guy says to his buddy, "You'll never believe what happened</p><p>last night."</p><p>His buddy says. "Well then, tell me what happened."</p><p>The guy says, " Last night the doorbell rang, and when I opened</p><p>the door, there was my ex-mother-in-law on the front porch.</p><p>She said, "Can I stay here for a few days?"</p><p>I said, "Of course, you can," and shut the door."</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">~~~~~~~~</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Mr. and Mrs. Nearier come before the judge for their divorce hearing. The judge says, "What are the grounds?" Mrs. Nearier says,</p><p>"Cruel and inhuman punishment.</p><p>He tied me to the bed and then forced me to sing the National Anthem while he pissed all over me."</p><p>The judge says, "My God, that's horrible."</p><p>She says, "Yeah. He KNOWS how much I hate that song."</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red"> </span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">~~~~~~~~</span></strong></p><p></p><p>The mortician calls Mrs. Jones, and says, "Excuse me Mrs. Jones, but I</p><p>can't seem to close the lid to your husband's coffin because he has a</p><p>huge erection." To which she replies, "Why don't you cut it off and</p><p>stick it up his ass? That's the only hole in town it hasn't been in."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 3295273, member: 14320"] This guy says to his buddy, "You'll never believe what happened last night." His buddy says. "Well then, tell me what happened." The guy says, " Last night the doorbell rang, and when I opened the door, there was my ex-mother-in-law on the front porch. She said, "Can I stay here for a few days?" I said, "Of course, you can," and shut the door." [B][COLOR="Red"]~~~~~~~~[/COLOR][/B] Mr. and Mrs. Nearier come before the judge for their divorce hearing. The judge says, "What are the grounds?" Mrs. Nearier says, "Cruel and inhuman punishment. He tied me to the bed and then forced me to sing the National Anthem while he pissed all over me." The judge says, "My God, that's horrible." She says, "Yeah. He KNOWS how much I hate that song." [B][COLOR="Red"] ~~~~~~~~[/COLOR][/B] The mortician calls Mrs. Jones, and says, "Excuse me Mrs. Jones, but I can't seem to close the lid to your husband's coffin because he has a huge erection." To which she replies, "Why don't you cut it off and stick it up his ass? That's the only hole in town it hasn't been in." [/QUOTE]
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