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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3271210" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>A man with a stuttering problem tries everything he can to stop</p><p>stuttering, but he can't. Finally, he goes to a world renowned doctor</p><p>for help. The doctor examines him and says "I've found your problem.</p><p>Your penis is 12 inches long. It weighs so much it is pulling on your</p><p>lungs, causing you to stutter."</p><p>So the man asks, "What's the cure, doctor?".</p><p>To which the doctor replies,</p><p>"We have to cut off 6 inches."</p><p>The man thinks about it, and eager to cure his stuttering,</p><p>agrees to the operation.</p><p>The operation is a success, and he stops stuttering.</p><p></p><p>Two months later he calls the doctor and tells him that since he had</p><p>the 6 inches cut off, all of his girlfriends have dumped him, and his</p><p>love life has gone down the tubes. He wants the doctor to operate</p><p>to put back the six inches. Not hearing anything on the line, he</p><p>repeats himself, "Hey doc, didn't you hear me?</p><p>I want my 6 inches back!"</p><p>Finally, the doctor responds, "F-f-f-f-f-f-uck Y-y-you!</p><p></p><p>•••</p><p></p><p>How can you tell if a girl is really horny?</p><p>When you put your hand down her pants it feels like you are feeding a</p><p>horse!!</p><p></p><p>•••</p><p></p><p>What's the definition of "relative humidity"?</p><p>That's the sweat running down the crack of your ass as you're screwing</p><p>your sister-in-law.</p><p></p><p>•••</p><p></p><p>Q: Why do women take longer than men to reach orgasm?</p><p>A: Who cares?</p><p></p><p>Q: How do you know when it's time to wash dishes and clean the house?</p><p>A: Look inside your pants; if you have a penis, it's not time.</p><p></p><p>Q: Why are there so many homes for battered women?</p><p>A: Because they just don't fucking listen!!</p><p></p><p>Q: What's the difference between a paycheck and a penis?</p><p>A: You don't have to beg your girlfriend to blow your paycheck.</p><p></p><p>Q: Why do you have to wrap duct tape around a gerbil?</p><p>A: So that it doesn't explode when you sodomize it.</p><p></p><p>•••</p><p></p><p>Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse were in</p><p>divorce court and the judge said to Mickey,</p><p>"You say here that your wife is crazy."</p><p>Mickey replied,</p><p>"I didn't say she was crazy, I said she's fucking Goofy."</p><p></p><p>•••</p><p></p><p>What is the difference between a woman sitting in Church and</p><p>a woman sitting in the bath tub?</p><p>The woman sitting in Church has hope in her soul and the woman</p><p>sitting in the bath tub has soap in her hole.</p><p></p><p>•••</p><p></p><p>A bloke came home and found his missus in bed with three blokes.</p><p>"Hello, hello, hello!" he screamed at them.</p><p>"Aren't you talking to me?" his missus snapped.</p><p></p><p>•••</p><p></p><p>Little Johnny was in his math's class one day when the teacher singled him out.</p><p>"If I gave you $20," the teacher began," and you gave $5 to Mary, $5 to Sally</p><p>and $5 to Susan, what would you have?"</p><p>"An orgy," Johnny answered.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 3271210, member: 14320"] A man with a stuttering problem tries everything he can to stop stuttering, but he can't. Finally, he goes to a world renowned doctor for help. The doctor examines him and says "I've found your problem. Your penis is 12 inches long. It weighs so much it is pulling on your lungs, causing you to stutter." So the man asks, "What's the cure, doctor?". To which the doctor replies, "We have to cut off 6 inches." The man thinks about it, and eager to cure his stuttering, agrees to the operation. The operation is a success, and he stops stuttering. Two months later he calls the doctor and tells him that since he had the 6 inches cut off, all of his girlfriends have dumped him, and his love life has gone down the tubes. He wants the doctor to operate to put back the six inches. Not hearing anything on the line, he repeats himself, "Hey doc, didn't you hear me? I want my 6 inches back!" Finally, the doctor responds, "F-f-f-f-f-f-uck Y-y-you! ••• How can you tell if a girl is really horny? When you put your hand down her pants it feels like you are feeding a horse!! ••• What's the definition of "relative humidity"? That's the sweat running down the crack of your ass as you're screwing your sister-in-law. ••• Q: Why do women take longer than men to reach orgasm? A: Who cares? Q: How do you know when it's time to wash dishes and clean the house? A: Look inside your pants; if you have a penis, it's not time. Q: Why are there so many homes for battered women? A: Because they just don't fucking listen!! Q: What's the difference between a paycheck and a penis? A: You don't have to beg your girlfriend to blow your paycheck. Q: Why do you have to wrap duct tape around a gerbil? A: So that it doesn't explode when you sodomize it. ••• Mickey Mouse and Minnie Mouse were in divorce court and the judge said to Mickey, "You say here that your wife is crazy." Mickey replied, "I didn't say she was crazy, I said she's fucking Goofy." ••• What is the difference between a woman sitting in Church and a woman sitting in the bath tub? The woman sitting in Church has hope in her soul and the woman sitting in the bath tub has soap in her hole. ••• A bloke came home and found his missus in bed with three blokes. "Hello, hello, hello!" he screamed at them. "Aren't you talking to me?" his missus snapped. ••• Little Johnny was in his math's class one day when the teacher singled him out. "If I gave you $20," the teacher began," and you gave $5 to Mary, $5 to Sally and $5 to Susan, what would you have?" "An orgy," Johnny answered. [/QUOTE]
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