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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3268911" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">A College Freshman</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A certain virginal and shy college freshman was lucky to have a roommate</p><p>who was considerably more experienced. When the bashful boy broke down and</p><p>explained his predicament, his roommate was quick to offer to set him up</p><p>with a blonde who'd made the rounds of the campus.</p><p></p><p>"Just take this bimbo out to dinner and a show, and then let nature take its</p><p>course," he explained reassuringly. "This girl knows what the score is, and</p><p>she's even a natural blonde."</p><p></p><p>The roommate arranged the date as promised. The freshman was</p><p>delighted by his cute, outgoing companion and they spent the evening dining</p><p>and dancing.</p><p></p><p>On the way home he parked his car in a dark lane, broke out in a cold sweat,</p><p>and blurted out, "Gosh, I sure would love to have a little pussy."</p><p></p><p>"I would too," sighed the blonde, "mine's the size of a goddamn milk pail."</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_____</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Things Not To Say After Sex</p><p></p><p>You're good enough to do this for a living!</p><p></p><p>Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed?</p><p></p><p>If you quit smoking you might have more endurance.</p><p></p><p>And to think, I didn't even have to buy you dinner!</p><p></p><p>I was so horny tonight I would have taken a duck home!</p><p></p><p>Hey, when is it going to be my friend's turn?</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_____</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Tommy comes home one day and asks his father what a cunt is. His father</p><p>takes him up to the bedroom where his wife is sleeping and takes off the</p><p>covers. He points to the area between her legs and explains that is called</p><p>a vagina, and the other 160 pounds is the cunt.</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_____</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red"></span></strong></p><p>Humpty Dumpty sat on the bed,</p><p>Little Bo Peep was giving him head,</p><p>As soon as he came she started to weep,</p><p>She knew by the taste he'd been fucking her sheep</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_____</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Two old ladies are at the movies. "Psst," says one old lady. "I think the guy next to me is beating off." "What makes you say that?" "He's using my hand."</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">_____</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red"></span></strong></p><p>A man enters his apartment to find his wife making</p><p>passionate love on the couch with another man, and</p><p>starts yelling at her.</p><p></p><p>"Oh great!" said the woman. "Big mouth's home, now</p><p>the whole building will know!"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 3268911, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]A College Freshman[/COLOR][/B] A certain virginal and shy college freshman was lucky to have a roommate who was considerably more experienced. When the bashful boy broke down and explained his predicament, his roommate was quick to offer to set him up with a blonde who'd made the rounds of the campus. "Just take this bimbo out to dinner and a show, and then let nature take its course," he explained reassuringly. "This girl knows what the score is, and she's even a natural blonde." The roommate arranged the date as promised. The freshman was delighted by his cute, outgoing companion and they spent the evening dining and dancing. On the way home he parked his car in a dark lane, broke out in a cold sweat, and blurted out, "Gosh, I sure would love to have a little pussy." "I would too," sighed the blonde, "mine's the size of a goddamn milk pail." [B][COLOR="Red"]_____[/COLOR][/B] Things Not To Say After Sex You're good enough to do this for a living! Did I tell you my Aunt Martha died in this bed? If you quit smoking you might have more endurance. And to think, I didn't even have to buy you dinner! I was so horny tonight I would have taken a duck home! Hey, when is it going to be my friend's turn? [B][COLOR="Red"]_____[/COLOR][/B] Tommy comes home one day and asks his father what a cunt is. His father takes him up to the bedroom where his wife is sleeping and takes off the covers. He points to the area between her legs and explains that is called a vagina, and the other 160 pounds is the cunt. [B][COLOR="Red"]_____ [/COLOR][/B] Humpty Dumpty sat on the bed, Little Bo Peep was giving him head, As soon as he came she started to weep, She knew by the taste he'd been fucking her sheep [B][COLOR="Red"]_____[/COLOR][/B] Two old ladies are at the movies. "Psst," says one old lady. "I think the guy next to me is beating off." "What makes you say that?" "He's using my hand." [B][COLOR="Red"]_____ [/COLOR][/B] A man enters his apartment to find his wife making passionate love on the couch with another man, and starts yelling at her. "Oh great!" said the woman. "Big mouth's home, now the whole building will know!" [/QUOTE]
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