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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 3206224" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong>Nasty One Liners</strong></p><p></p><p>What's the sex change theme song?</p><p>Yes, We Have No Bananas!</p><p></p><p>How do you get a nun pregnant?</p><p>Fuck her!</p><p></p><p>Why did the priest get AIDS?</p><p>He forgot to clean his organ between hymns!</p><p></p><p>What is a kosher cold cut?</p><p>A JAP breaking wind in the winter!</p><p></p><p>What would you call a girl who's fat and perverted?</p><p>A bisexual built for two!</p><p></p><p>What happens when you're feeling low?</p><p>Your date slaps you!</p><p></p><p>What is French asthma?</p><p>You can only catch your breath in snatches!</p><p></p><p>Why should you always travel with a six-pack in the winter?</p><p>In case you have to leave a message in the snow!</p><p></p><p>What's smaller than a flea's a$$hole?</p><p>Flea sh*t!</p><p></p><p>What's a gay astronaut's greatest ambition?</p><p>To visit Uranus!</p><p></p><p>What's the best way to make yourself last with your girlfriend?</p><p>Let everyone else go first!</p><p></p><p>What's next to the Andes?</p><p>The Amoses!</p><p></p><p>Why are squirrels like faggots?</p><p>Sometimes they have nuts in their mouths!</p><p></p><p>Do girls like paintings of nude men in their living rooms?</p><p>Yes, as long as they're hung well!</p><p></p><p>What do you find under the hood in an Italian car?</p><p>His girlfriend!</p><p></p><p>What would you call a Scotch queer?</p><p>Ben Doon!</p><p>And his boyfriend?</p><p>Phil McCrevis!</p><p></p><p>How can you tell if an Indian is gay?</p><p>All his scalps have handles!</p><p></p><p>What's worse than a piano that's out of tune?</p><p>An organ that stops working in the middle of a piece!</p><p></p><p>Who wears pink tights and drives a chariot?</p><p>Ben Gay!</p><p></p><p>What should you do if your date yells, "I can't take it any longer!"?</p><p>Tell her not to worry; it's not gonna get any longer!</p><p></p><p>What did the Indian say when the prostitute tied a knot in his pecker?</p><p>"How come!"</p><p></p><p>How did Adolph the Brown-Nosed Reindeer get his name?</p><p>He could run as fast as Rudolph, he just couldn't stop as fast!</p><p></p><p>How can you tell if a bride is anxious?</p><p>She comes walking down the aisle!</p><p></p><p>Why would Kotex be effective as a national defense product?</p><p>They would keep the Reds in, the Poles out, the Greeks happy, and</p><p>the French hungry!</p><p></p><p>Why is it stupid for a man to get a little bit on the side?</p><p>Because there's so much more around the front!</p><p></p><p>Why did the Italians lose the war?</p><p>They ordered ziti instead of shells!</p><p></p><p>What's the difference between "oooh" and "aahhh?"</p><p>About three inches!</p><p></p><p>Why did the guy trade his wife for a Datsun pickup?</p><p>It had a smaller box and a smoother ride!</p><p></p><p>How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb?</p><p>Three, One to change the bulb, one to write about the socket being</p><p>exploited and one to wish she was the socket!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 3206224, member: 14320"] [B]Nasty One Liners[/B] What's the sex change theme song? Yes, We Have No Bananas! How do you get a nun pregnant? Fuck her! Why did the priest get AIDS? He forgot to clean his organ between hymns! What is a kosher cold cut? A JAP breaking wind in the winter! What would you call a girl who's fat and perverted? A bisexual built for two! What happens when you're feeling low? Your date slaps you! What is French asthma? You can only catch your breath in snatches! Why should you always travel with a six-pack in the winter? In case you have to leave a message in the snow! What's smaller than a flea's a$$hole? Flea sh*t! What's a gay astronaut's greatest ambition? To visit Uranus! What's the best way to make yourself last with your girlfriend? Let everyone else go first! What's next to the Andes? The Amoses! Why are squirrels like faggots? Sometimes they have nuts in their mouths! Do girls like paintings of nude men in their living rooms? Yes, as long as they're hung well! What do you find under the hood in an Italian car? His girlfriend! What would you call a Scotch queer? Ben Doon! And his boyfriend? Phil McCrevis! How can you tell if an Indian is gay? All his scalps have handles! What's worse than a piano that's out of tune? An organ that stops working in the middle of a piece! Who wears pink tights and drives a chariot? Ben Gay! What should you do if your date yells, "I can't take it any longer!"? Tell her not to worry; it's not gonna get any longer! What did the Indian say when the prostitute tied a knot in his pecker? "How come!" How did Adolph the Brown-Nosed Reindeer get his name? He could run as fast as Rudolph, he just couldn't stop as fast! How can you tell if a bride is anxious? She comes walking down the aisle! Why would Kotex be effective as a national defense product? They would keep the Reds in, the Poles out, the Greeks happy, and the French hungry! Why is it stupid for a man to get a little bit on the side? Because there's so much more around the front! Why did the Italians lose the war? They ordered ziti instead of shells! What's the difference between "oooh" and "aahhh?" About three inches! Why did the guy trade his wife for a Datsun pickup? It had a smaller box and a smoother ride! How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Three, One to change the bulb, one to write about the socket being exploited and one to wish she was the socket! [/QUOTE]
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