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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064650573" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>Raise In Salary</p><p></p><p>Salary Increase</p><p></p><p>I, the penis, hereby request a raise in salary for</p><p>the following reasons:</p><p></p><p>> I do physical labor</p><p>> I work at great depths</p><p>> I plunge headfirst into everything I do</p><p>> I do not get weekends off or public holidays</p><p>> I work in a damp environment</p><p>> I don't get paid overtime</p><p>> I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation</p><p>> I work in high temperatures</p><p>> My work has the potential to expose me to contagious</p><p>diseases</p><p></p><p>Reply</p><p></p><p>Dear Penis,</p><p>After assessing your request, and considering the</p><p>arguments you have</p><p>raised, the administration rejects your request for</p><p>the following reasons:</p><p></p><p>> You do not work 8 hours straight</p><p>> You fall asleep on the job after brief work periods</p><p>> You do not always follow the orders of the management team</p><p>> You do not stay in your allocated position, and often Visit other areas</p><p>> You do not take initiative - you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working</p><p>> You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift</p><p>> You don't always observe necessary safety regulations,</p><p>Such as wearing the correct protective clothing</p><p>> You'll retire well before reaching 65</p><p>> You're unable to work double shifts</p><p>> You sometimes leave your allocated position before you have completed</p><p>the days work</p><p>> And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and leaving the workplace carrying two suspicious looking bags</p><p>> Sincerely</p><p>> The Management</p></blockquote><p></p>

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