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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064642045" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>Rent A Porn Flick</p><p></p><p>This guy comes back home from work to find his wife has left him a note "Off to the grocery store".</p><p></p><p>He hasn't been *getting any* from her, so he decides this is his chance and goes to the video store to rent a porn flick.</p><p></p><p>He puts the video in, and starts masturbating.</p><p></p><p>He's about to climax when all of a sudden his wife comes in, drops her grocery bags, runs over and gives him the blowjob of his life.</p><p></p><p>Then she collects all the bags and goes to the kitchen.</p><p></p><p>The guy is sitting there, stunned, amazed at what just happened.</p><p></p><p>After a couple of minutes he regroups and goes to the kitchen where he finds his wife chopping tomatoes.</p><p></p><p>He asks her: "We haven't had sex for over five years and all of a sudden you come in...... what happened?!".</p><p></p><p>To which his wife replied: "I just washed the floor this morning. I would rather go brush my teeth than to have to clean the floor again."</p><p></p><p>=====</p><p></p><p>There once were three women from Birmingham </p><p>And this is the story concerning them. </p><p>They lifted the frock </p><p>and tickled the cock </p><p>of the Bishop while he was confirming them.</p><p></p><p>Now the Bishop was nobody's fool </p><p>(He'd gone to a good public school) </p><p>So he pulled down their britches </p><p>and buggered those bitches </p><p>with his ten inch Episcopal tool. </p><p></p><p>When he'd filled up the last one with goo </p><p>She said, as the Bishop withdrew </p><p>"The Vicar is thicker </p><p>and quicker and slicker </p><p>and longer and stronger than you!"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064642045, member: 14320"] Rent A Porn Flick This guy comes back home from work to find his wife has left him a note "Off to the grocery store". He hasn't been *getting any* from her, so he decides this is his chance and goes to the video store to rent a porn flick. He puts the video in, and starts masturbating. He's about to climax when all of a sudden his wife comes in, drops her grocery bags, runs over and gives him the blowjob of his life. Then she collects all the bags and goes to the kitchen. The guy is sitting there, stunned, amazed at what just happened. After a couple of minutes he regroups and goes to the kitchen where he finds his wife chopping tomatoes. He asks her: "We haven't had sex for over five years and all of a sudden you come in...... what happened?!". To which his wife replied: "I just washed the floor this morning. I would rather go brush my teeth than to have to clean the floor again." ===== There once were three women from Birmingham And this is the story concerning them. They lifted the frock and tickled the cock of the Bishop while he was confirming them. Now the Bishop was nobody's fool (He'd gone to a good public school) So he pulled down their britches and buggered those bitches with his ten inch Episcopal tool. When he'd filled up the last one with goo She said, as the Bishop withdrew "The Vicar is thicker and quicker and slicker and longer and stronger than you!" [/QUOTE]
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