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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064630244" data-attributes="member: 14320">Cool ShortiesA drunk walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her and kissed her. She jumped up and slapped him. He immediately apologized and explained,"I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Who would marry you you worthless, wretched, no good, piece of shit drunk?!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound like her."=====A man is out, driving happily along in his car LATE one Saturday evening. Before too long, the cops pull him over.The policeman walks up to the man and asks, "Have you been drinking, sir?""Why? Was I weaving all over the road?""No," replied, the policeman, "you were driving splendidly. Itwas the ugly fat chick in the passenger seat that gave you away."====="When my sugar daddy dies," confided Justine to Jamie,"I inherit the lot... it's in his last will and testicles.""You mean testament," chuckled Jamie."No, testicles..." said Justine, "I've got him by the balls."</blockquote>

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