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JeSt fOr LaUgHs...
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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064623887" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>That Beautiful Girl At Work</p><p></p><p>Jeff walks into a bar and sees his friend Paul slumped over the bar. He walks over and asks Paul what's wrong. </p><p></p><p>"Well," replies Paul, "you know that beautiful girl at work that I wanted to ask out, but I got an erection every time I saw her?" </p><p></p><p>"Yes," replies Jeff with a laugh. </p><p></p><p>"Well," says Paul, straightening up, "I finally plucked up the courage to ask her out, and she agreed." </p><p></p><p>"That's great!" says Jeff, "When are you going out?" </p><p></p><p>"I went to meet her this evening," continues Paul, "but I was worried I'd get an erection again. So I got some duct tape and taped my penis to my leg, so if I did, it wouldn't show." </p><p></p><p>"Sensible" says Jeff. </p><p></p><p>"So I get to her door," says Paul, "and I rang her doorbell. She answered it in the sheerest, tiniest dress you ever saw." </p><p></p><p>"And what happened then?" </p><p></p><p>(Paul slumps back over the bar again.) </p><p></p><p>"I kicked her in the face."</p><p></p><p>=====</p><p></p><p>Q: What can make you feel really good or be very annoying?</p><p>A: A woman's mouth!</p><p></p><p>Q: What are the two words every man does NOT want to hear after a blow job? </p><p>A: Kiss Me</p><p></p><p>=====</p><p></p><p>Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch, doing nothing.</p><p></p><p>One lady turns and asks, "Do you still get horny?" The other replies, "Oh sure I do."</p><p></p><p>The first old lady asks, "What do you do about it?" The second old lady replies, "I suck a lifesaver."</p><p></p><p>After a few moments, the first old lady asks, "Who drives you to the beach?"</p><p></p><p>=====</p><p></p><p>There Was A Young Nun From Peru </p><p>Whom The Bishop Wanted To Screw, </p><p>But She Said 'The Vicar </p><p>Is Quicker And Slicker, </p><p>And Three Inches Longer Than You.'</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064623887, member: 14320"] That Beautiful Girl At Work Jeff walks into a bar and sees his friend Paul slumped over the bar. He walks over and asks Paul what's wrong. "Well," replies Paul, "you know that beautiful girl at work that I wanted to ask out, but I got an erection every time I saw her?" "Yes," replies Jeff with a laugh. "Well," says Paul, straightening up, "I finally plucked up the courage to ask her out, and she agreed." "That's great!" says Jeff, "When are you going out?" "I went to meet her this evening," continues Paul, "but I was worried I'd get an erection again. So I got some duct tape and taped my penis to my leg, so if I did, it wouldn't show." "Sensible" says Jeff. "So I get to her door," says Paul, "and I rang her doorbell. She answered it in the sheerest, tiniest dress you ever saw." "And what happened then?" (Paul slumps back over the bar again.) "I kicked her in the face." ===== Q: What can make you feel really good or be very annoying? A: A woman's mouth! Q: What are the two words every man does NOT want to hear after a blow job? A: Kiss Me ===== Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch, doing nothing. One lady turns and asks, "Do you still get horny?" The other replies, "Oh sure I do." The first old lady asks, "What do you do about it?" The second old lady replies, "I suck a lifesaver." After a few moments, the first old lady asks, "Who drives you to the beach?" ===== There Was A Young Nun From Peru Whom The Bishop Wanted To Screw, But She Said 'The Vicar Is Quicker And Slicker, And Three Inches Longer Than You.' [/QUOTE]
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