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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064611163" data-attributes="member: 14320">Splitting HeadacheI cuddled up to my wife and softly whispered into her ear: "Could we make love, please dear?"She rolled over away from him. "Not tonight, darling, I've got a splitting headache," she replied rather tersely.Too horny to read the obvious signals the husband pleaded. "Please, honey. I'll only stick it in for a minute""What do you think I am," his wife retorted, "a fucking microwave?"=====Dave was staring sadly into his pint and sighed heavily."What's up Dave" asked the Landlord..."It's not like you to be so down in the mouth""It's my four year old son..." the man replied."Don't tell me, he's in trouble for fightingin school? - my lad's just the same - forgetabout it, it happens to boys that age" saidthe landlord, sympathetically. " I only wishit was that" continued the customer, " but it'sfar worse than that. The little bastard has gotour gorgeous 18 year old next door neighbor pregnant.""Get away, that's impossible!" gasped the landlord"It's not" said the man..."the little shit stuck a pin in all my condoms"=====Q. What does do women and milk cartons have in common?A. You gotta open the flaps to get to the good stuff.Q. What happens when you kiss a canary?A. You get chirpes, it can't be tweeted because its a canarial disease.Q. What does the receptionist at the sperm clinic say to clients as they are leaving?A. Thanks for coming.Q. Why do bunnies have soft sex?A. They have cotton ballsQ. How can you tell if you are in a gay amusement park?A. They issue gerbils at the tunnel of love.</blockquote>

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