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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064602259" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>Aging...</p><p></p><p>Three men were discussing aging at the nursing home. Sixty is the worst</p><p>age to be," said the 60- year-old. You always feel like you have to</p><p>pee.</p><p>And most of the time, you stand at the toilet and nothing comes out!"</p><p></p><p>"Ah, that's nothin'," said the 70-year-old. When you're seventy, you</p><p>don't have a bowel movement anymore. You take laxatives, eat bran, you</p><p>sit on the toilet all day and nothin' comes out!"</p><p></p><p>"Actually," said the 80-year-old, "Eighty is the worst age of all."</p><p></p><p>"Do you have trouble peeing too?" asked the 60-year-old.</p><p></p><p>"No, not really. I pee every morning at 6:00. I pee like a racehorse on</p><p>a flat rock; no problem at all."</p><p></p><p>"Do you have trouble having a bowel movement?"</p><p></p><p>"No, I have one every morning at 6:30."</p><p></p><p>With great exasperation, the 60-year-old said, "Let me get this</p><p>straight. You pee every morning at 6:00 and poop every </p><p>morning at 6:30. So what's so tough about being 80?"</p><p></p><p>"I don't wake up until 7:00."</p><p></p><p>=====</p><p></p><p>One day, a diver was enjoying the aquatic world 20 feet below </p><p>sea level. He noticed a guy at the same depth, but with no scuba </p><p>gear whatsoever. The diver went below another 20 feet, and the </p><p>guy joined him a few minutes later. The diver went down 25 feet </p><p>more, and minutes later, the same guy joined him.</p><p></p><p>This confused the diver, so he took out a waterproof chalkboard set,</p><p>and wrote, "How the heck are you able to stay under this deep</p><p>without equipment?"</p><p></p><p>The guy took the board and chalk, erased what the diver had written,</p><p>and wrote, ..."I'm drowning, you fucking moron...!"</p></blockquote><p></p>

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