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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064587880" data-attributes="member: 14320">Oral Sex A man went to a whorehouse to get some practice performing oral sex on his wife. The woman at the front desk gave him a key and told him to go to room 319. The man walked into the room and met the lady of the evening. He told her why he was there, so she gave him a few pointers and then told him to go for it. So, the man began performing oral sex and he was, by her reaction, pretty good at it. But something strange happened. A couple of minutes into the deed, he felt something in his mouth. He spit it into his hand and found a piece of carrot. "Oh man, that's nasty!" he thought, but he said nothing and continued. A couple of minutes later, he came up with a pea. "Damn, can't take much more of this. There's something wrong with this bitch." But again, he said nothing and gave it one more shot. A couple of minutes later, he came up with a piece of chicken. He couldn't stand it any longer. "I can't do this anymore! I'm gonna throw up!" "That's funny," remarked the hooker, "that's what the last guy did."=====Why don't pygmies wear tampons?They keep stepping on the strings.What do you call an Amish guy with his hand up a horse's ass?A mechanic!Q: Why did God create alcohol?A: So ugly people would have a chance to have sex.Q: What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladiesA: A bingo machine.</blockquote>

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