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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064562457" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>On Answering Machines:</p><p></p><p>Did you ever hear one of these corny, 'positive' messages on someone's</p><p>answering machine? They usually go something like this....... "Hi,</p><p>it's a great day & I'm out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The</p><p>thought for the day is, 'Share the love.' Leave your name & number </p><p>after the beep. I'll get right back to ya." >></p><p></p><p>"Uh, yeah...this is the VD clinic calling..... Speaking of being</p><p>'positive', your test is back. STOP sharing the love!" Click.</p><p></p><p>_____</p><p></p><p>The teenager was developing rapidly, so her mother thought it</p><p>about time that she understood the facts of life.</p><p>"Liza," she began, "I think it would be nice if we had a little chat about how</p><p>life is formed. As you know, a baby grows in a lady's tummy and..."</p><p>"It might be interesting to hear you tell it, Mom," interrupted the daughter,</p><p>"but what I really want to know is how to fake an orgasm."</p><p></p><p>_____</p><p></p><p>The wife appeared at the breakfast table in curlers and a worn </p><p>bathrobe. </p><p>The husband looked up from his newspaper and said, "Why can't you look</p><p>like you did when we were first married?" </p><p>"How can I?" she snapped back. "I'm not pregnant!"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064562457, member: 14320"] On Answering Machines: Did you ever hear one of these corny, 'positive' messages on someone's answering machine? They usually go something like this....... "Hi, it's a great day & I'm out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The thought for the day is, 'Share the love.' Leave your name & number after the beep. I'll get right back to ya." >> "Uh, yeah...this is the VD clinic calling..... Speaking of being 'positive', your test is back. STOP sharing the love!" Click. _____ The teenager was developing rapidly, so her mother thought it about time that she understood the facts of life. "Liza," she began, "I think it would be nice if we had a little chat about how life is formed. As you know, a baby grows in a lady's tummy and..." "It might be interesting to hear you tell it, Mom," interrupted the daughter, "but what I really want to know is how to fake an orgasm." _____ The wife appeared at the breakfast table in curlers and a worn bathrobe. The husband looked up from his newspaper and said, "Why can't you look like you did when we were first married?" "How can I?" she snapped back. "I'm not pregnant!" [/QUOTE]
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