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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064558837" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>You Know It's Time For A Diet When:</p><p></p><p>*You dive into a swimming pool so your friends can go surfing.</p><p></p><p>*You have to apply your makeup with a paint roller.</p><p></p><p>*Weight Watchers demands your resignation.</p><p></p><p>*You step on a pennyweight scale that gives you your fortune and it </p><p>says, "One at a time please!"</p><p></p><p>*Your face is so full that you look like you're wearing horn-rimmed</p><p>contact lenses.</p><p></p><p>*The bus driver asks you to sit on the other side because he wants to</p><p>make a turn without flipping over.</p><p></p><p>*You're at school in the classroom and turn around and erase the entire </p><p>blackboard</p><p></p><p>*They throw puffed rice at your wedding.</p><p></p><p>*You hiccup in your bathing suit, and it looks like someone adjusting a </p><p>Venetian blind.</p><p></p><p>*You fall down and try to get up, and in the process rock yourself to</p><p>sleep.</p><p></p><p>*You dance and it makes the band skip.</p><p></p><p>*You are diagnosed with the flesh eating virus, and the doctor gives you 22 more years to live.</p><p></p><p>*You put mayonnaise on an aspirin.</p><p></p><p>*You go to the zoo and the elephants throw you peanuts.</p><p></p><p>*Your driver's license says, "Picture continued on other side."</p><p></p><p>*You ran away and they had to use all four sides of the milk carton for your picture.</p><p></p><p>*You learn you were born with a silver shovel in your mouth.</p><p></p><p>*You could sell shade.</p><p></p><p>*You need an appointment to attend an ' open house'.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064558837, member: 14320"] You Know It's Time For A Diet When: *You dive into a swimming pool so your friends can go surfing. *You have to apply your makeup with a paint roller. *Weight Watchers demands your resignation. *You step on a pennyweight scale that gives you your fortune and it says, "One at a time please!" *Your face is so full that you look like you're wearing horn-rimmed contact lenses. *The bus driver asks you to sit on the other side because he wants to make a turn without flipping over. *You're at school in the classroom and turn around and erase the entire blackboard *They throw puffed rice at your wedding. *You hiccup in your bathing suit, and it looks like someone adjusting a Venetian blind. *You fall down and try to get up, and in the process rock yourself to sleep. *You dance and it makes the band skip. *You are diagnosed with the flesh eating virus, and the doctor gives you 22 more years to live. *You put mayonnaise on an aspirin. *You go to the zoo and the elephants throw you peanuts. *Your driver's license says, "Picture continued on other side." *You ran away and they had to use all four sides of the milk carton for your picture. *You learn you were born with a silver shovel in your mouth. *You could sell shade. *You need an appointment to attend an ' open house'. [/QUOTE]
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