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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064225721" data-attributes="member: 14320">One night, a man was feeling very "in the mood," so he decides to get himselfa hooker.Since he doesn't have much money, He finds the cheapest whore in thenearest RedLight District. He spends $10 for a blowjob and a fuck, and in the morninghe wakes upand discovers he has crabs. He goes back to the same hooker, and says"Hey, yougave me crabs! What is up with this?" The hooker replies, "What did youexpect for$10? Lobster?"^0^0^0^0^0The zoology teacher ask a small boy to make a sentence using the word "possum."He answered, "Maw got horny and gave possum."Q: What'd the wife do when she found out her husband was a fag?A: She turned around and took it like a man!^0^0^0^0^0"Where Babies Come From?"A blonde teenage girl comes home fromschool and asks her mother, "Is it true whatRita just told me ..... Babies come out of thesame place where boys put their thingies?""Yes, dear." replies her mother, pleased thatthe subject had finally come up, and shewouldn't have to explain it in detail to herdaughter."But then, when I have a baby," respondedthe blonde teenager, "won't it knock myteeth out?"^0^0^0^0^0A man was walking down the street.A hooker stops him and says,"Say, wanna have a good time?""Sure", he says And off they go to the nearest motel. She takesoff her clothes as he keeps staring at her.She says, "Is this the first pussy you seen since you crawled out ofone?""Nope, just the first one I've seen big enough to crawl back into."More Redneck New Year’s Resolutions31. Have some of that Franklin Mint breath freshener;32. Wear your only tie - made of leather, silver and turquoise;33. Buy a can of Mountain Dew to serve as a container to spit tobacco juice in;34. Have your house picked up every week;35. Make bar-b-que a daily thing;36. Visit your favourite room in your house - the Dark Side;37. Practice doctorin’ with Mamma’s sewing kit and a jug;38. Hold a guy over your head because of a fight over a CD radio;39. Show ‘em your new breed of horse – your Ford Mustang;40. Start a preference to sleep in the truck than in your house;41. Stand in line to have your picture made with a freak of nature;42. Break wind in public and blame it on your kid;43. Valet park a snowplow;44. Vacuum the sheets instead of washing them;45. Get an official letter of recognition from a tobacco or beer company;46. Take reading material into an airplane restroom;47. Pay for a 6-pack of beer with pennies;48. Hang up some beautiful hubcap wind chimes for your neighbors; 49. Hang a Bud Light pool table light over your dining room table;50. Make the strongest smell in your house butane;51. Have your dog pass gas and claim it for yourself;52. Try not to mistake your Aunt Betty for a man;53. Find out where that Third World country “paprika” is;54. Ask the preacher, “How’s it hanging?”;55. Go to a stock car race without a program;56. Make a bumper sticker that says, “My Momma’s an honor student at the local junior high”;57. Bake one of your favourite hors d’oeuvres - potted meat on a saltine;58. Play the banjo in your high school band;59. Show the neighbours your velvet paintings, bought from an art dealer on the side of the highway;60. Buy some old hubcaps for your truck ‘cause you’re using the new hubcaps to feed your hunting dogs;</blockquote>

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