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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064186750" data-attributes="member: 14320">For the ladies out there......What do women and prawns have in common?Their heads are full of shit but the pink bits taste greatWhat's worse than your dentist telling you, you have herpes?Your mother telling you.What do you call a gay man who's had a vasectomy?A seedless fruit.=======A college professor is explaining to his class that pleasure is a mentalstate, and that many people overlook the things they already have.He explains, "A man who has developed a true sense of appreciation canenjoy a good bowel movement as much as having sexual intercourse."Little Johnny stands up and says, "Professor, either you don't know howto fuck, or I don't know how to shit."=======A girl came home from a date. Her mother had waited up for her, and when the girl walked in the door, the mother noticed she had rice in her hair."Sally," she said, "you didn't tell me you were going to a wedding.""I didn't mom," Sally replied. "I was giving a blowjob to a Chinese guy and he threw up on me."=======A man brings home a cock sucking frog and gives it to his wife.She asks "What the fuck am I supposed to do with that"So he replies "Teach it to cook, then fuck off"=======After some great sex, she lies there stroking his prick.He asks "Do you want more sex?""No" she replies, "I’m just admiring your cock... I really miss mine."=======Q: What do you call a Serbian prostitute ?A: Sloberdown Mycockyoubitch.Q: Why do women call it PMS ?A: Mad Cow Disease was already taken.CUCUMBERS ARE BETTER THAN MEN BECAUSE.......(Long But Funny)*A cucumber a day keeps the OB-GYN away.*A cucumber can always wait until you get home.*A cucumber doesn't care if you always spend the holidays with your family.*A cucumber doesn't flush the toilet while you are taking a shower.*A cucumber doesn't turn your bathroom into a library.*A cucumber doesn't use your toothbrush, roll on deodorant, or hair spray.*A cucumber isn't allergic to your cat.*A cucumber never forgets to flush the toilet.*A cucumber never has to call "the wife".*A cucumber never snaps your bra, or pinches your butt.*A cucumber never suffers from performance anxiety.*A cucumber never wants to get it on when your nails are wet.*A cucumber never wants to improve your mind.*A cucumber will always respect you in the morning.*A cucumber will never call and say, "I have to work late, honey." and then come home with the smell of Channel No. 19 on him.*A cucumber will never leave you for another cucumber.*A cucumber will never leave you for another man.*A cucumber will never leave you for another woman.*A cucumber will never make a scene because there are other cucumbers in the refrigerator..*A cucumber won't ask "Am I the first?"*A cucumber won't care what time of the month it is.*A cucumber won't come home late, stinking of beer.*A cucumber won't fall asleep on your chest or drool on the pillow.*A cucumber won't fall asleep too soon.*A cucumber won't grab cash from your purse while you're asleep.*A cucumber won't lie to you about having a vasectomy.*A cucumber won't make you sleep on the wet spot.*A cucumber won't mind hiding in the refrigerator when your mother comes over.*A cucumber won't need to be sucked off.*A cucumber won't pout if you have a headache.*A cucumber won't say "Let's keep trying until we have a boy."*A cucumber won't take you to a disco and dump you for a flashy blonde.*A cucumber won't tell you he's outgrown you intellectually.*A cucumber won't tell you that size doesn't matter.*A cucumber won't want to cum on your face.*Cucumbers stay hard for a week.*Cucumbers won't ask am I the best?*Cucumbers won't ask did you come? How many times?*Cucumbers won't ask how was it?*Cucumbers won't give you a hickey.*Cucumbers won't leave hair on the sink or a ring in the tub.*Cucumbers won't make you wear kinky clothes or go to bad with your boots on.*Cucumbers won't tell other cucumbers you're a virgin.*Cucumbers won't tell you a vasectomy will ruin it for him.*Cucumbers won't write ! your name and number on the men's room wall.*No matter how you slice it, you can always have your cuke and eat it too.*No matter what age group you are in, you can always get a fresh cucumber.*The average cucumber is at least seven inches long.*With a cucumber you can get a single room and you won't have to check in as "Mrs." Cucumber.*With a cucumber, the toilet seat is always the way you left it.*With a cucumber, you never have to say you're sorry.*With cucumbers, you don't have to be a virgin more than once.*You always know where YOUR cucumber has been.*You can fondle cucumbers in a supermarket and you know how firm it is before you take it home.*You only eat cucumbers when you feel like it.*You won't find out later that your cucumber is married.*You won't find out later that your cucumber is on penicillin or have AIDS.*You won't find out later that your cucumber likes you, but loves your brother*You won't find out that a cucumber is married.*You won't find out that a cucumber is trying to screw your sister.*Your mother won't flip out finding a cucumber in your house.</blockquote>

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something nice (and informative) to share

well, i hope it is not a re-post. if it is, mods, please delete this thread.
first time sharing video.... hope the codes work....

called the ultimate-GTR, i humbly share the great video of z-tune gtr.

pls help my lil bro

halo...2 all sifu...my lil bro just bought r34 N.A ....can any body help him wanna install turbo kit....and also d budget...tanx so much

Test: Mitsubishi Lancer GLX 1.6