Menu
Home
Post Something
Forums
Current Activity
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
Latest activity
News & Features
The Marketplace
Cars for Sale
Engine and Performance
Chassis and Wheels
Exterior and Body
Interior and Cockpit
ICE - In Car Entertainment
Car Shops and Services
Toys and Wares
All Other Stuff
Jobs and Vacancies
Looking For
Members
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
Current Activity
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Reply to thread
See what others are reading now! Try Forums >
Current Activity
Home
Forums
Main Forums
General Talk
JeSt fOr LaUgHs...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Message
<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064182615" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Women vs. Men</span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">The Perfect Day for Her:</span></strong></p><p></p><p>8:15 Wakeup to hugs and kisses</p><p>8:30 Weigh in 5lbs lighter than yesterday</p><p>8:45 Breakfast in bed, fresh squeezed orange juice and croissants 9:15 Soothing hot bath with fragrant lilac bath oil 10:00 Light workout at club with handsome, funny personal trainer</p><p>10:30 Facial, manicure, shampoo and comb out</p><p>12:00 Lunch with best friend at outdoor cafe</p><p>12:45 Notice ex-boyfriends wife, she has gained 30lbs</p><p>1:00 Shopping with friends, unlimited credit</p><p>3:00 Nap</p><p>4:00 3 dozens roses delivered by florist, card is from secret admirer</p><p>4:15 Light workout at club, followed by gentle massage</p><p>5:30 Pick out outfit for dinner, prim before the mirror</p><p>7:30 Candlelight dinner for two followed by dancing</p><p>10:00 Hot shower (alone)</p><p>10:30 Make love</p><p>11:00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling</p><p>11:15 Fall asleep in his big strong arms </p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">The Perfect Day for Him!</span></strong></p><p></p><p>6:00 Alarm</p><p>6:15 Blowjob</p><p>6:30 Massive dump while reading sports section of USA Today</p><p>7:00 Breakfast, Filet mignon and eggs, toast and coffee</p><p>7:30 Limo arrives</p><p>7:45 Stoli Bloody Mary enroute to airport</p><p>8:15 DFW - Private G4 to Augusta, Georgia (Coffee, SI and WSJ)</p><p>9:30 Limo to Augusta National Golf Club</p><p>9:45 Front nine at Augusta (2 under)</p><p>11:45 Lunch, 2 dozen oysters on the half shell, 3 Heinekens</p><p>12:15 Blowjob</p><p>12:30 Back nine Augusta (4 under)</p><p>2:15 Limo back to airport (Bombay martini)</p><p>2:30 Private G4, Augusta to Nassau, Bahamas (nap)</p><p>3:15 Late afternoon fishing excursion with all female (topless) crew</p><p>4:30 Land World Record light tackle Marlin (1249 lbs)</p><p>5:00 G4 back to DFW, massage & hand job enroute by naked Kathy Ireland</p><p>6:45 Shit, shower and shave</p><p>7:00 Watch CNN newsflash: Clinton resigns, Hillary and Al Gore farm animal video released and authenticated. (Hillary has a secret mole, Al looks real cold)</p><p>7:30 Dinner, Lobster appetizers, Dom Perigon (1963), 20 oz. New York Steak</p><p>9:00 Remy Martin and Cuban Partagas cigar</p><p>9:30 Sex with three women</p><p>11:00 Massage and Jacuzzi</p><p>11:45 Bed (alone)</p><p>11:50 12 second, 4 note fart, dog leaves the room</p><p>11:55 Sleep </p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">A Thirteen Year Old With A Hard-on</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A man notices his thirteen-year-old son has been walking around for a week with a hard-on in his pants, and figures the boy needs some relief. He gives the kid twenty dollars and says: "Take this to the whorehouse at the other end of town, and have some fun."</p><p>Well, the whorehouse is a good hour walk each way, but the boy returns in only 45 minutes. The father says: "where were you?"</p><p>"Well," says the boy, "when I walked by Grandma's house she asked where I was going and I told her. She said, 'why don't you just come in here instead, and I'll do you for free.' So that's what I did."</p><p>The father, outraged, screams: "Are you telling me you fucked my MOTHER?"</p><p>"What's the big deal," says the boy, "you fuck mine!"</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">nnn</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A woman is on the witness stand testifying:</p><p>"I was walking down the sidewalk, when he grabbed me, dragged me into an alley, ripped off my dress, pulled down my panties, and bent me over a garbage can... I...I don't even remember what happened next..."</p><p>The judge says (jerking off motion), "Make something up! Make something up!"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064182615, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Women vs. Men The Perfect Day for Her:[/COLOR][/B] 8:15 Wakeup to hugs and kisses 8:30 Weigh in 5lbs lighter than yesterday 8:45 Breakfast in bed, fresh squeezed orange juice and croissants 9:15 Soothing hot bath with fragrant lilac bath oil 10:00 Light workout at club with handsome, funny personal trainer 10:30 Facial, manicure, shampoo and comb out 12:00 Lunch with best friend at outdoor cafe 12:45 Notice ex-boyfriends wife, she has gained 30lbs 1:00 Shopping with friends, unlimited credit 3:00 Nap 4:00 3 dozens roses delivered by florist, card is from secret admirer 4:15 Light workout at club, followed by gentle massage 5:30 Pick out outfit for dinner, prim before the mirror 7:30 Candlelight dinner for two followed by dancing 10:00 Hot shower (alone) 10:30 Make love 11:00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling 11:15 Fall asleep in his big strong arms [B][COLOR="Teal"]The Perfect Day for Him![/COLOR][/B] 6:00 Alarm 6:15 Blowjob 6:30 Massive dump while reading sports section of USA Today 7:00 Breakfast, Filet mignon and eggs, toast and coffee 7:30 Limo arrives 7:45 Stoli Bloody Mary enroute to airport 8:15 DFW - Private G4 to Augusta, Georgia (Coffee, SI and WSJ) 9:30 Limo to Augusta National Golf Club 9:45 Front nine at Augusta (2 under) 11:45 Lunch, 2 dozen oysters on the half shell, 3 Heinekens 12:15 Blowjob 12:30 Back nine Augusta (4 under) 2:15 Limo back to airport (Bombay martini) 2:30 Private G4, Augusta to Nassau, Bahamas (nap) 3:15 Late afternoon fishing excursion with all female (topless) crew 4:30 Land World Record light tackle Marlin (1249 lbs) 5:00 G4 back to DFW, massage & hand job enroute by naked Kathy Ireland 6:45 Shit, shower and shave 7:00 Watch CNN newsflash: Clinton resigns, Hillary and Al Gore farm animal video released and authenticated. (Hillary has a secret mole, Al looks real cold) 7:30 Dinner, Lobster appetizers, Dom Perigon (1963), 20 oz. New York Steak 9:00 Remy Martin and Cuban Partagas cigar 9:30 Sex with three women 11:00 Massage and Jacuzzi 11:45 Bed (alone) 11:50 12 second, 4 note fart, dog leaves the room 11:55 Sleep [B][COLOR="Teal"]A Thirteen Year Old With A Hard-on[/COLOR][/B] A man notices his thirteen-year-old son has been walking around for a week with a hard-on in his pants, and figures the boy needs some relief. He gives the kid twenty dollars and says: "Take this to the whorehouse at the other end of town, and have some fun." Well, the whorehouse is a good hour walk each way, but the boy returns in only 45 minutes. The father says: "where were you?" "Well," says the boy, "when I walked by Grandma's house she asked where I was going and I told her. She said, 'why don't you just come in here instead, and I'll do you for free.' So that's what I did." The father, outraged, screams: "Are you telling me you fucked my MOTHER?" "What's the big deal," says the boy, "you fuck mine!" [B][COLOR="Red"]nnn[/COLOR][/B] A woman is on the witness stand testifying: "I was walking down the sidewalk, when he grabbed me, dragged me into an alley, ripped off my dress, pulled down my panties, and bent me over a garbage can... I...I don't even remember what happened next..." The judge says (jerking off motion), "Make something up! Make something up!" [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
The Marketplace Latest
Honda city JSracing gtwing spoiler
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Honda civic fd ~car spray(Ferrari red)
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Honda jazz fit gk flrs body kit
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F10 ~M5 front skirt lip with glossy black
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Kia Forte gtwing spoiler
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F30 M3 front skirt lip
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Proton Saga VVT Evo Front Bonnet Hood
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Perodua bezza gear up body kit/spoiler
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW F10 ~M5 front bumper set ~M5 kidney grille...
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
BMW f30 mad style front skirt lip
Started by
jeff6126
Exterior and Body
Posts refresh every 5 minutes
Unchip w turbo module good enough?
Is Unchip q good enough for L15A engine with turbo?
I saw alot ppl sell away unchip. what happen?
Is there any special reason?
What my understanding is just airfuel ratio, doesn't meet the standard???
can blue e-manage remove speed cut?
can e-manage remove speed cut??
and
anyone wat's the price for a blue e-manage include install n setting on a b16a.. around kl area..
thx guys!!
where to buy pivot start button ?
anyone selling those start/stop button ala pivot start button ?
i remember someone taht carries such button around 40-50 bucks ... EL lighted .
Recent Posts
Darker Design : Mercedes-Benz Launches GLA Nightfall Edition in Malaysia
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
Honda Malaysia Doubles Down on Hybrids: New CR-V Launches with Dual e:HEV...
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
BateriHub Reaches 200-Store Milestone, Becomes Malaysia’s Largest...
Started by
The_Mechanic
News and Features
Been stalking for 3 years edy
Started by
dheepadarshan95
Introduction and Newbies
Recommendation: Turbocharger for 4B11 N.A engine
Started by
Mitevo7
Car Modification
Search
Online now
Enjoying Zerotohundred?
Log-in
for an ad-less experience
Home
Forums
Main Forums
General Talk
JeSt fOr LaUgHs...