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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064177537" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p>A lady with a duck under her arm gets on a train and takes a seat.</p><p>The guy sitting opposite her speaks up and says "That is the ugliest pig</p><p>I have ever seen". The lady replies "This is not a pig, it's a duck."</p><p>The guy then says, "Shut up you stupid bitch, I was talking to the duck."</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">@@@</span></strong></p><p></p><p>This is a hole that never heals</p><p>The more you rub it the better it feels</p><p>And all the soap from here to hell</p><p>Can never get rid of that fucking smell</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">@@@</span></strong></p><p></p><p>Q. What's the difference between a g-spot and a golf ball?</p><p>A. A man will actually search for a golf ball.</p><p></p><p>Q. What's the difference between a man and a hog?</p><p>A. A hog doesn't have to sit in a bar and buy drinks all night long just</p><p>to fuck some pig.</p><p></p><p>Q: How can you tell if a crab is an insomniac?</p><p>A: It only sleeps in snatches.</p><p></p><p>Q: How do you get them out?</p><p>A: With corn chips.</p><p></p><p>Q: How is a woman like a road?</p><p>A: Both have manholes.</p><p></p><p>Q: Why are women like screen doors?</p><p>A: Once they get banged a few times, they loosen up.</p><p></p><p>Q: What do you call the space between the vagina and the asshole?</p><p>A: A Chin Rest.</p><p>Q: What do you call the useless flesh which surrounds a vagina?</p><p>A: A woman.</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Women Bashing...</span></strong></p><p></p><p>She goes to all parties incognito -- No leash</p><p></p><p>They even made a movie about her sex life --"The Night</p><p>of the Living Dead"</p><p></p><p>She's not pushing forty --She's dragging it!</p><p></p><p>I'm not saying she's fat --But I could have sworn I</p><p>heard her calves "moo"</p><p></p><p>She's been "Born again" --Trouble is, she came back as herself</p><p></p><p>I'm not saying she's narrow minded...Then again, she</p><p>only wears one earring</p><p></p><p>Although the doctor said she didn't have ulcers.</p><p>Her husband insists she's a carrier.</p><p></p><p>I'm not saying she's a pushy broad...But I hear she took</p><p>private lessons from Hillary</p><p></p><p>She inherited her beauty --Her Father left her the</p><p>family's drugstore</p><p></p><p>She sez her face is her fortune --I agree, but she oughta</p><p>keep it in a vault</p><p></p><p>I wouldn't exactly say she was fat --She's just a little</p><p>broad shouldered around the hips</p><p></p><p>Personally, I think she overdid the diet bit --She could</p><p>be a poster girl for a famine</p><p></p><p>She always sez "Talk is Cheap" --She oughta know; I think</p><p>she gets it wholesale</p><p></p><p></p><p>A girl phoned me and said, "Come on over there's nobody home."</p><p>I went over - nobody was home !!</p><p></p><p>I could never get girls. So to fool my friends, I'd go to a</p><p>drive in and do push ups in the back seat of the car.</p><p></p><p>My wife only has sex with me for a purpose.</p><p>Last night she used me to time an egg.</p><p></p><p>Q. How can you tell a female Hershey bar?</p><p>A. Its the one without the nuts</p><p>Q. What's the difference between dark and hard?</p><p>A. It stays dark all night.</p><p>Q. Why do men like blow jobs?</p><p>A. It's the only time they get something into a woman's head straight.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1064177537, member: 14320"] A lady with a duck under her arm gets on a train and takes a seat. The guy sitting opposite her speaks up and says "That is the ugliest pig I have ever seen". The lady replies "This is not a pig, it's a duck." The guy then says, "Shut up you stupid bitch, I was talking to the duck." [B][COLOR="Red"]@@@[/COLOR][/B] This is a hole that never heals The more you rub it the better it feels And all the soap from here to hell Can never get rid of that fucking smell [B][COLOR="Red"]@@@[/COLOR][/B] Q. What's the difference between a g-spot and a golf ball? A. A man will actually search for a golf ball. Q. What's the difference between a man and a hog? A. A hog doesn't have to sit in a bar and buy drinks all night long just to fuck some pig. Q: How can you tell if a crab is an insomniac? A: It only sleeps in snatches. Q: How do you get them out? A: With corn chips. Q: How is a woman like a road? A: Both have manholes. Q: Why are women like screen doors? A: Once they get banged a few times, they loosen up. Q: What do you call the space between the vagina and the asshole? A: A Chin Rest. Q: What do you call the useless flesh which surrounds a vagina? A: A woman. [B][COLOR="Teal"]Women Bashing...[/COLOR][/B] She goes to all parties incognito -- No leash They even made a movie about her sex life --"The Night of the Living Dead" She's not pushing forty --She's dragging it! I'm not saying she's fat --But I could have sworn I heard her calves "moo" She's been "Born again" --Trouble is, she came back as herself I'm not saying she's narrow minded...Then again, she only wears one earring Although the doctor said she didn't have ulcers. Her husband insists she's a carrier. I'm not saying she's a pushy broad...But I hear she took private lessons from Hillary She inherited her beauty --Her Father left her the family's drugstore She sez her face is her fortune --I agree, but she oughta keep it in a vault I wouldn't exactly say she was fat --She's just a little broad shouldered around the hips Personally, I think she overdid the diet bit --She could be a poster girl for a famine She always sez "Talk is Cheap" --She oughta know; I think she gets it wholesale A girl phoned me and said, "Come on over there's nobody home." I went over - nobody was home !! I could never get girls. So to fool my friends, I'd go to a drive in and do push ups in the back seat of the car. My wife only has sex with me for a purpose. Last night she used me to time an egg. Q. How can you tell a female Hershey bar? A. Its the one without the nuts Q. What's the difference between dark and hard? A. It stays dark all night. Q. Why do men like blow jobs? A. It's the only time they get something into a woman's head straight. [/QUOTE]
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