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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064148386" data-attributes="member: 14320">Tarzan And JaneTarzan had been living alone in his jungle kingdom for 25 years with only suitably shaped holes in trees for sex. Jane, a reporter, came to Africa in search of this legendary figure.One day, deep in the wild, she came to a clearing and discovered Tarzan vigorously thrusting into a jungle oak. She watched in awe for a while. Finally, overcome by this display of animal passion, Jane came out into the open and offered herself to him.As she reclined on the wild grass, Tarzan became aroused. He quickly ran over and kicked her in the crotch. In pain, she screamed, "What the hell did you do that for?"Tarzan replied, "Tarzan always checks for squirrels."___________Two old friends are having coffee when the first woman says,"I hear that you've been telling people that I'm ugly!""Oh NO! I've just been saying that your new hairdo makes you look lessattractive.""I also heard that you've been calling me fat?!?""Oh NO! I just said that the way you wear those stripes makes you looklarger than you really are.""I've also heard that you're saying that my husband has a wart on his dick!""Oh NO! I only said that it feels like he has a wart on his dick!"Bee Sting-For the guys only!!!!A young woman had been taking golf lessons.She had just started playing her first round of golf.When she suffered a bee sting.Her pain was so intense that she decided to returnTo the clubhouse for help and to complain.Her golf pro saw her come into the clubhouse and asked,'Why are you back in so early? What's wrong?''I was stung by a bee', she said.'Where', he asked.'Between the first and second hole', she replied.He nodded knowingly and said,'Then your stance is too wide.'_______________A couple was making love outdoors when suddenly a bee flies into the woman’s vagina. They go to the hospital were the doctor say "mmm, well with both your permission I could put some honey on the tip of my penis and try to lure him out". So the doctor puts some honey on the tip of his penis and starts to gently push it in and out of the vagina. He started pushing harder and harder up until he started ramming his penis up her vagina. The boyfriend said, "What the hell do you think you are doing". "I’ve changed my mind I’m going to drown the bastard"!!!</blockquote>

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