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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064041191" data-attributes="member: 14320">Playing DoctorAfter discovering her young daughter playing doctor with theneighbor's boy, the angry mother grabbed the boy by the ear anddragged him to his house and confronted his mother."It's only natural for young boys and girls to explore theirsexuality by playing doctor at their age," the neighbor said."Sexuality?!" the mother yelled. "He took out her appendix!"***********Four guys and a woman are stuck in an elevator. While they are stuck, theystrike up a conversation.The first guy says, "I'm a Y.U.P.P.I.E. , you know...''Young, Urban, Professional, Peaceful, Intelligent, Ecologist.''The second guy says, "I'm a D.I.N.K.Y., you know...''Double Income, No Kids Yet. "The third guy says, "I'm a R.U.B., you know...''Rich, Urban, Biker. "The fourth guy says, I am a D.I.L.D.O., you know...''Double Income, Little Dog Owner.''They turn to the woman and ask her.''What are you?''She replies: "I'm a WIFE, you know...Wash, Iron, Fuck, Etc.''********There was an Indian, a caveman, and a cowboy. One day they ran out of food and decided to go hunting. The Indian went out and got a bear, the caveman and the cowboy said, how did you get that? He said,” Me find tracks me follow tracks me get bear." So the next day the cowboy went out and got a deer, the caveman said,” How did you get that? He said "Me find tracks me follow tracks me get deer." So when the caveman got backs from his hunt all bloody, and disfigured. The Indian and cowboy said,” How did that happen?" The caveman replied, "Me find tracks, me follow tracks me get hit by train!!" Safe Sex TipsThese days, safe sex isn't just a good idea, it's amatter of life or death. Here are some valuable tipsto help you "play it safe":* Do not blow dealers for crack; blow regular citizensfor cash, then buy the crack directly.* Think about parents' nude bodies during foreplay;resultant loss of erection will prevent potentialunsafe sex.* Wash hands thoroughly before fisting goat.* Under no circumstances should you give CPR to a stranger.* Avoid dipping penis in buckets of AIDS-infected blood.* Don't fall for lines like, "God protects his servants inthe clergy from harm."* Pull out cat's teeth before pouring gravy over vagina.* Do not, no matter how much peers may pressure you, allowanyone to get to third base with you.* Make sure all open sores on penis have thoroughly driedand scabbed over before use.* When taking four cocks in the ass, make sure to have anequal amount of cock in your mouth to reduce the risk ofCHI imbalance.* Stock up on free safe-sex pamphlets at local health clinic;use them to make paper-mache genital wrap.* Before fellating anonymous man in back room of gay bar,be sure to ask, "You don't have AIDS, do you?"* Douse penis liberally with D-Con roach spray beforepenetrating ape.* You CAN get it from kissing -- tear out partner's tonguebefore any mouth-to-mouth contact.* To prevent radiation exposure, use only lead-based condoms.* Avoid talking to homosexuals at all costs.* If you must engage in unsafe sex, take time out beforehandto hope for the best.O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0O0Q: What does an elephant use as a tampon?A: A SheepQ: What does an elephant use as a vibrator?A: An epileptic pygmyQ: What's green with 15 breasts?A: The wheelie bin behind the breast cancer clinic.</blockquote>