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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1064004540" data-attributes="member: 14320">The Devil In HellThree men died and went to hell. When they get there the devil asks the first guy why he was there and he replied "I have a drinking problem." so the devil puts him in a room with every kind of alcohol he can imagine, then he locks the door. He then asks the 2nd guy why he was there the guy then says, "I can't stop cheating on my wife." The devil then puts him in a room with the hottest girl ever and locks the door. Then he asks the last guy why he was there he reply "I’m a pot smoker.” So the devil locks him in a room with lots and lots of pot. In a hundred years the devil comes back and unlocks the first door and the guy comes out and says,” I will never drink again! "So the devil sends him to heaven. He goes to the 2nd door and opens it and the guy comes out and says" I will never look at another woman again!" so the devil sends him to heaven. Finally he goes to the third door and opens it and goes in and there is the pot smoker sitting there with tears coming down his face. When devil asks him what is wrong he replies, " Hey man you got a light?"=======My nookie days are over,my pilot light is out,what used to be my sex appeal,is now my waterspout.Time was when, on its own accord,from my trousers it would spring,but now I’ve got a full-time job,to find the blasted thing,It used to be embarrassing,the way it would behave,for every single morning,it would stand and watch me shave.Now as old age approaches,it sure gives me the blues,to see it hang its little head,and watch me tie my shoes!Author unknown=======Two morons are riding around looking for a place to have a picnic. One moron says, "Hey, lets have a picnic over there under that tree." The other moron says," No, no, lets have it in the middle of the road." They fought and came to a decision to have it in the middle of the road. Not long afterwards a car came speeding towards them, swerved off the road and ran into the tree. One moron says, “See if we were over there we would be dead right now."</blockquote>