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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063958995" data-attributes="member: 14320">A Man Named JacquesOne summer, a few years ago, a middle age French-Canadian man namedJacques decided to vacation on the coast of Maine. While soaking upsome sun on the beach, a very pretty girl caught his eye and his sexualdesires. He immediately got up, ran to her, grabbed her by the hand andbrought her to his hotel room. There he had sex with her and then sentthe young lady on her way. She immediately reported this to the policeand Jacques was arrested.On his court date the judge asked him if he understood the nature ofthe crime he committed against the young lady. Jacques looked at thejudge with a bewildered look and said "Non!! Hi don't understand! Hinmy country you grab de pretty girl, bring her to de hotel room,BOOM-BOOM,give hit to her den let her go! Hit's O.K.!!!""Sir", the judge said, in THIS country if you are to have sex with alady, you must have her permission first, or it is considered rape.Youmust have her consent!"After hearing this, Jacques turned around and mysteriously looked atthe judge and exclaimed, "CUNSCENT!!! Hi got her cunscent!!! Hi got hercunscent on my fingers, cunscent on my mustache, hi got her cunscenteverywhere!!!A doctor at an insane asylum decided to take his patients to a baseball game.For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands.When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well.When the National Anthem began, the doctor yelled, "Up nuts!"... The patients complied by standing up.After the anthem, the doctor yelled, "Down nuts!" so the patients all sat back down in their seats.During the game, one of the players hit a home run. The doctor yelled, "Cheer nuts!" so the patients all broke out into applause and cheers.Considering things were going very well, the doctor decided to leave his patients momentarily and get some munchies and a beer.When the returned to his seat, there was a riot in progress."What happened?" he asked a fellow patron sitting next to his group.The fellow replies, "Well... everything was going just fine until this guy walked by and yelled "Peanuts! Peanuts! Peanuts!"</blockquote>