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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063944018" data-attributes="member: 14320">GroanersIn which battle did Napoleon die?His last battle.Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?At the bottom of the page.The Talahatchie River flows in which state?Liquid.What is the main reason for divorce?Marriage.What can you never eat for breakfast?Lunch and Dinner.What looks like half an apple?The other half.If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what will it become?It will become wet.How can you lift an elephant with one hand?You will never find an elephant that has only one hand.How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?Any way you want, concrete floors are very hard to crack!What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead give away!)She was engaged to a man with a wooden leg, but broke it off!If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.A Local Area Network in Australia is a LAN down under!Every calendar's days are numbered.Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.Acupuncture is a jab well done.Paddy says to Mick, "Christmas is on Friday this year". Mick says, "Let's hope it's not the 13th then."My friend just hired an Eastern European cleaner. It took her 5 hours to hoover the house. Turns out she was a Slovak!I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be honest I only intended to rough him up a bit!The fattest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class, because it was a weapon of math disruption.No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery!A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.Broken NoseA girl meets her friend......"Whassup? You look so pale.""I'm going to drown myself.""What's the problem?""No one wants to fuck me. My pussy stinks.""Relax. I'll introduce you to a boxer. His nose is broken, he can't smell a thing!"She meets the boxer. They're in the bed when suddenly the man gets up and starts putting his clothes on."Hey, what's the wrong?""Your pussy stinks!""But your nose is broken! You can't smell it!""Yea, but my eyes are watering!"=========Big Dicks are good ones for fuckin'.But Huge Dicks I say keep on truckin'.'Cause smaller ones I've found,As my tongue makes it's rounds,Are the perfect size for suckin'.=========Q: What's the difference between a child molesterand a fucking freak?A: Political correctness.Q: What does a Jewish woman say just before she has an orgasm?A: "Sorry Mom, but I have to hang up now!"Q: Why are blondes like Corn Flakes?A: Because they're simple, they're easy, and they taste good!Q: What's the most common cause of hearing loss among men?A: His wife saying she wants to talk to him.Q: How long did it take to fill the red sea?A: A very long period.Why is a joke like pussy?Neither is any fun if you don't get it !!</blockquote>

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