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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063805651" data-attributes="member: 14320">Snow Whites MissionEver wonder how the seven dwarfs got their names?Miss Snow White was a randy cow,And desperate for a fuck.So off she went into the woods,To try and get some luck!She'd almost given up looking,When she saw some chimney smoke.Then stumbled on a cottage,And went in for a poke.Her clothes came off in seconds.And she'd just removed her pants,When seven Dwarfs came marching in,With a merry song and dance.Snow White just stood there speechless,And thought she was in heaven!Originally after one good shag,But now she could have seven.Straight away she took command,"My cunt now needs a lick!"And when one dwarf moved forward,She said "Oi-you'd better drop you prick!"So down he went onto all fours,And said "I ain't licking that!""Not there, that me ass-hole,You DOPEY little brat!"The next dwarf started blushing,"Do we have to do it here?"Snow White said "Don't be BASHFUL!Unless you're fucking queer!"So reluctantly he whipped it out,To prove he was no fool.And Snow White gave a big "Heigh-Ho"As she rode upon his tool.Now one dwarf wasn't smiling,'Cos he hadn't had a sniff.And due to his impatience,He couldn't raise a stiff."Relax, you GRUMPY idiot",So he did as he was told.And as soon as he was hard enough,He shot his fucking load.The next dwarf got a blowAnd she took him in quite easy.But she just avoided brain-damage,When he sneezed, she called him SNEEZY.With three dwarves left, she turned and said,"You're next, I want your knob!"But no sooner had he entered her,Than he was sleeping on the job."Wake up you SLEEPY idiot"She wanted more from him.And he woke with such excitement,That he filled her hairy quim.The next dwarf rammed his up her,And shagged her cunt raw.And dazed Snow White then whimpered,"That should be against the law!"He made poor Snow White tremble,He was so big and thick."No wonder you're so HAPPY,With that fucking great big dick."With one dwarf still remaining,But feeling rather sore,She said "You'll have to use your tongue,My cunt can't take no more.!"And so he put his tongue to work,Where others had put their cocks.And 'cos he made Snow White feel better,She named the last one DOC.Now Snow White couldn't do much,With all that cum inside her quim,So she grabbed a cup, and squatted,And filled it to the brim.So there's the truth about the dwarfs,And how they got their names,By satisfying miss Snow White,And joining in her games.There's one more thing you need to know,And that's what happened to that cup?Well think of what you're drinking...When you next buy 7-UP Hung over Signs* You'd rather have a pencil driven through your retinathan be exposed to sunlight.* Trying to gain control of the situation, you continueto tell your room to "Stay still."* Looking at yourself in the mirror induces the samereaction as chugging a glass of fresh paint.* You're convinced that the chirping birds are Satan's pets.* You set aside an entire morning to spend some quality timewith your toilet.* You replaced the traditional praying on your knees with themore feasible praying in a fetal position.* The bathroom reminds you of a carnival barker shouting,"Step right up and give it whirl!"* All day long your motto is, "Never again."* You could purchase a new bike just by recycling the bottlesaround your bed.* Your natural response to "Good morning," is "Shut up!"A mortician was working late one night. It was hisjob to examine the dead bodies before they weresent off to be buried or cremated.As he examined the body of Mr. Schwartz, whowas about to be cremated, he made an amazingdiscovery: Schwartz had the longest penis hehad ever seen!"I'm sorry Mr. Schwartz," said the mortician, "ButI can't send you off to be cremated with atremendously huge penis like this. It has to besaved for posterity."And with that the coroner used his tools toremove the dead man's schlong.The coroner stuffed his prize into a briefcaseand took it home. The first person he showedwas his wife. "I have something to show youthat you won't believe," he said, and openedhis briefcase."Oh my god!" she screamed, "Schwartz is dead!"</blockquote>

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