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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063759106" data-attributes="member: 14320">Application To Go On The Jerry Springer Showhttp://img442.imageshack.us/img442/5649/springer7328573.gifWanker.Last name: ________________ First name: (Check appropriate box)(_) Billy-Bob(_) Billy-Joe(_) Billy-Ray(_) Billy-Sue(_) Billy-Mae(_) Billy-Jack What does everyone call you?(_) Booger(_) Bubba(_) Junior(_) Sissy(_) Other___________________ Age: ____ (if unsure, guess) _____ Not sure Shoe Size: ____ Left ____ Right Occupation: (Check appropriate box)(_) Farmer(_) Mechanic(_) Hair Dresser(_) Unemployed(_) Dirty Politician(_) Preacher Spouse's Name:_________________________ 2nd Spouse's Name:______________________ 3rd Spouse's Name:______________________ Lover's Name:___________________________ Relationship with spouse: (Check appropriate box)(_) Sister(_) Brother(_) Aunt(_) Uncle(_) Cousin(_) Mother(_) Father(_) Son(_) Daughter(_) Pet Number of children living in household: _____ Number of children living in shed: ______ Number that are yours: ______ Mother's Name: _______________________(If not sure, leave blank) Father's Name: _______________________(If not sure, leave blank) Education: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest grade completed) Total number of vehicles you own: ___ Number of vehicles that still crank: ___ Number of vehicles in front yard: ___ Number of vehicles in back yard: ___ Number of vehicles on cement blocks: ___ Firearms you own and where you keep them:____ truck____ bedroom____ bathroom____ kitchen____ shedModel and year of your pickup: 196_ Do you have a gun rack?If no, please explain: Newspapers/magazines you subscribe to:(_) The National Enquirer(_) The Globe(_) TV Guide(_) Soap Opera Digest(_) Rifle and Shotgun Number of times you've seen a UFO:_____ Number of times in the last 5 years you've seen Elvis:_____ Number of times you've seen Elvis in a UFO:_____ How often do you bathe:(_) Weekly(_) Monthly(_) Not Applicable Colour of eyes:Right_____ left_____ Colour of hair:(_) Blond(_) Black(_) Red(_) Brown(_) White(_) Clairol Colour of teeth:(_) Yellow(_) Brownish-Yellow(_) Brown(_) Black(_) N/A Brand of chewing tobacco you prefer:(_)Red-Man How far is your home from a paved road?(_) 1 mile(_) 2 miles(_) Just a whoop-and-a-holler(_) road? ORAL SEX - AN ODE TO LOVE#2Penis breath, a lover's dread,Is what you get when you give head.Unpleasant as it tends to be,Be grateful that he doesn't pee.It's times like this, you wonder why,You bothered reaching for his fly.But it's too late, can't be a tease,Accept the facts, get on your knees.You know you've got a job to do,So open wide and shove it through,Lick the tip then take it all.Don't drag your teeth or he might bawl,Slide up and down, use your tongue.And feel the precum start to run,Your jaw it aches, your neck is numb,So when the fuck's he gonna cum.Just, when you can't take anymore,You hear your lover's mighty roar.And when he hits that real high note,You feel it oozing down your throat.Salty, fishy, sticky stuff,Okay already, that's enough.Let's switch you say, before you gag,And what revenge, you're on the rag.*******Two girls were walking down the sidewalk on a hot summer day.They come upon this old lady sitting on steps in front of her houseeating watermelon.They notice that she wasn't wearing any panties. So they ask her if itscooler without wearing any panties.She said, "I don't know if it's cooler, but it sure keeps the flies offthe watermelon."</blockquote>

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