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Message: <blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063506738" data-attributes="member: 14320">The GynecologistA girl goes to the gynecologist for the first time. She's up in thestirrups, and the doctor notices she's trembling. He says: You'renervous, aren't you?Yes, it's my first visit to a gynecologist.Would you like me to numb you down there?Oh, yes please.He sticks his face between her legs and goes Num, num, num .yyyyyCONFUCIUS SAY:Woman who springs on innerspring this spring, gets offspring next spring.Before becoming master fisherman, must be master baiter.Sex on beach is like American beer - very near water.Woman who pounce on dead rooster, go down on limp cock.Man who buy drowned cat, must pay for stinking wet pussy.Girl who is wallflower at party, may be dandelion in bed.Man who keep feet firmly on ground, have trouble putting on pantsWoman who slides down banister, makes monkey shine.yyyyyMy wife came home from the doctor's the other day and said that he toldher she couldn't make love. I've known this for years I want to know howhe found out!yyyyyIt was the first time the blonde was eating Thanksgiving dinner withouther family. Trying to re-enact the tradition, she prepared a dinner forherself. The next day her mother called to see how everything went.Oh, mother, I made myself a lovely dinner, but I had so much troubletrying to eat the turkey said the daughter.Did it not taste good her mother asked.I don't know,the blonde said. It wouldn't sit still! DownsizingA small business owner was faced with a problem that he needed todownsize his company. He added up all the receipts and discovered hecould get by if he laid off one of his employees. He looked in his filesand discovered that he had two new employees, one named Jill and theother named Jack. Because they had started on the same day at the sametime, he wondered how he would make the decision on who to fire. Finallyhe decided that the first one he saw taking a break would be fired.About ten minutes later, he saw Jill leaning against the wallnext to the water cooler. He left his office and walked over to her witha serious look on his face. He turned to her and said, "Jill, I have somerather bad news. It seems as though I'm going to lay you or Jack off."Jill looked at her employer and said, "Well, you're going to haveto jack off. I have a headache."#####A guy goes to visit his grandmother and he brings his friends with him.While he's talking to his grandmother, his friend finishes off somePeanuts on the coffee table.As they're leaving, his friend says to his grandmother,"Thanks for the peanuts."She says, "Sure, since I lost my dentures I can only suckThe chocolate off 'em." #####A gay guy pays a visit on his doctor and confides that he has, um, a vibrator stuck up his ass.The doc says, "No problem, I'll have it out shortly.""Oh, no, don't remove it."The doc says, puzzled, "Then what do you want me to do?""Change the batteries, please."#####Two ferocious cannibal chiefs sat licking their fingers after a large meal."Your wife makes a delicious roast, "The chief said."Thanks," his friend said. "I'm gonna miss her."</blockquote>

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