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<blockquote data-quote="melody" data-source="post: 1063478574" data-attributes="member: 14320"><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Ode To The Clit</span></strong></p><p></p><p>You try so hard to lick me well,</p><p>There's something I should really tell,</p><p>You're licking all around my mound,</p><p>But there's one place where pleasure's found.</p><p></p><p>It's not that high or down that low,</p><p>It's not that fast and not too slow,</p><p>Don't waste my time and all that spit,</p><p>Just stay your punk ass on my clit!</p><p>With your finger or with your tongue,</p><p>Stay on that clit till the job is done.</p><p>Suck it like a little dick,</p><p>The only place that you should lick,</p><p></p><p>Do not move until I cum,</p><p>The other stuff is really dumb.</p><p>I'm telling you to help you know,</p><p>The clit's the ONLY place to go.</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">()()()()()</span></strong></p><p></p><p>This is a tip for giving head,</p><p>You'll be an expert in the bed.</p><p></p><p>Women want all men to know,</p><p>Do it hard and do it slow.</p><p>Don't be lazy, this takes a while,</p><p>But it will always make her smile!</p><p>After she cums then you can Fuck,</p><p>And with a little bit of luck,</p><p>Your woman will be thrilled in bed,</p><p>You've finally learned to give good head!</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">()()()()()</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A kid, around 10 years old, ragged and dirty, is sitting on the</p><p>curb. A very shapely young lady passes. The kid calls out,</p><p>"Hey miss, miss?"</p><p>Lady stops, and he asks, "WIll you give me some</p><p>pussy?"</p><p>Lady slaps him across the face and walks off, leaving the</p><p>little urchin crying. Lady starts to ponder:</p><p>Geez, he's only about</p><p>10 years old, and probably doesn't know what he's saying.</p><p>Lady returns and walks up to the little boy and and says,</p><p>"I'm sorry for slapping you"</p><p>Between snuffles, he replies,</p><p>"That's ok, ma'am"</p><p>She decides to take him in the alley and give him some.</p><p>Surprisingly the kid had a big dick and knew what he was doing.</p><p>After the lady had 2</p><p>big orgasms and the kid shot his load, the lady asked,</p><p>" Do you ask every lady that question?"</p><p>Urchin: Yes Ma'am!</p><p>Lady: Then you must get a lot of slaps then.</p><p>Urchin: Yes, Ma'am.</p><p>But I also get a lot of pussy too!</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">()()()()()</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A man asked his friend, "How's your wife doing?"</p><p>The friend said, "Not too well. She hasn't been feeling herself</p><p>lately. But it was a damned dirty habit anyway."</p><p></p><p><strong><span style="color: Teal">Deer Hunter</span></strong></p><p></p><p>One Saturday morning a deer hunter gets up early, dresses</p><p>quietly, gets his lunch made, puts on his long johns, grabs</p><p>the gun and goes to the garage to warm up his truck and head</p><p>down to his favorite hunting area.</p><p></p><p>He backs his truck out of the garage and discovers the rain</p><p>is really pouring down, It is like a torrential downpour.</p><p>There is also some snow mixed in with the rain, and the wind</p><p>is blowing 50 MPH. He comes back into the house and turns the</p><p>TV to the weather channel. He finds it's going to be bad</p><p>weather all day long, so minutes later, he puts his truck in</p><p>the garage, quietly undresses and slips back into bed. There</p><p>he cuddles up to his wife's back, now with a different</p><p>anticipation, he whispers, "The weather out there is really</p><p>terrible." To which she sleepily replies, "Can you believe</p><p>my stupid ass husband is out hunting in that shit?"</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">___________________________________</span></strong></p><p></p><p>A man wakes up in hospital after a harrowing operation. The</p><p>surgeon is standing beside him in the bed. He looks up at</p><p>the surgeon - full of dread. Our man says timidly "Well, how</p><p>did the operation go?".</p><p></p><p>To which the surgeon replies "Well, I've got some good news</p><p>and some bad news".</p><p></p><p>"What's the good news?"</p><p></p><p>"We managed to save your testicles"</p><p></p><p>Our man breathes a big sigh of relief.</p><p></p><p>"What's the bad news?"</p><p>"They're under your pillow".</p><p><strong><span style="color: Red">___________________________________</span></strong></p><p></p><p>There once was a young holy roller,</p><p>Had a boy friend attempt to console her.</p><p>She'd gone down on his cock,</p><p>That was hard as a rock...</p><p>Chipped a tooth, plus she knocked out a molar.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="melody, post: 1063478574, member: 14320"] [B][COLOR="Teal"]Ode To The Clit[/COLOR][/B] You try so hard to lick me well, There's something I should really tell, You're licking all around my mound, But there's one place where pleasure's found. It's not that high or down that low, It's not that fast and not too slow, Don't waste my time and all that spit, Just stay your punk ass on my clit! With your finger or with your tongue, Stay on that clit till the job is done. Suck it like a little dick, The only place that you should lick, Do not move until I cum, The other stuff is really dumb. I'm telling you to help you know, The clit's the ONLY place to go. [B][COLOR="Red"]()()()()()[/COLOR][/B] This is a tip for giving head, You'll be an expert in the bed. Women want all men to know, Do it hard and do it slow. Don't be lazy, this takes a while, But it will always make her smile! After she cums then you can Fuck, And with a little bit of luck, Your woman will be thrilled in bed, You've finally learned to give good head! [B][COLOR="Red"]()()()()()[/COLOR][/B] A kid, around 10 years old, ragged and dirty, is sitting on the curb. A very shapely young lady passes. The kid calls out, "Hey miss, miss?" Lady stops, and he asks, "WIll you give me some pussy?" Lady slaps him across the face and walks off, leaving the little urchin crying. Lady starts to ponder: Geez, he's only about 10 years old, and probably doesn't know what he's saying. Lady returns and walks up to the little boy and and says, "I'm sorry for slapping you" Between snuffles, he replies, "That's ok, ma'am" She decides to take him in the alley and give him some. Surprisingly the kid had a big dick and knew what he was doing. After the lady had 2 big orgasms and the kid shot his load, the lady asked, " Do you ask every lady that question?" Urchin: Yes Ma'am! Lady: Then you must get a lot of slaps then. Urchin: Yes, Ma'am. But I also get a lot of pussy too! [B][COLOR="Red"]()()()()()[/COLOR][/B] A man asked his friend, "How's your wife doing?" The friend said, "Not too well. She hasn't been feeling herself lately. But it was a damned dirty habit anyway." [B][COLOR="Teal"]Deer Hunter[/COLOR][/B] One Saturday morning a deer hunter gets up early, dresses quietly, gets his lunch made, puts on his long johns, grabs the gun and goes to the garage to warm up his truck and head down to his favorite hunting area. He backs his truck out of the garage and discovers the rain is really pouring down, It is like a torrential downpour. There is also some snow mixed in with the rain, and the wind is blowing 50 MPH. He comes back into the house and turns the TV to the weather channel. He finds it's going to be bad weather all day long, so minutes later, he puts his truck in the garage, quietly undresses and slips back into bed. There he cuddles up to his wife's back, now with a different anticipation, he whispers, "The weather out there is really terrible." To which she sleepily replies, "Can you believe my stupid ass husband is out hunting in that shit?" [B][COLOR="Red"]___________________________________[/COLOR][/B] A man wakes up in hospital after a harrowing operation. The surgeon is standing beside him in the bed. He looks up at the surgeon - full of dread. Our man says timidly "Well, how did the operation go?". To which the surgeon replies "Well, I've got some good news and some bad news". "What's the good news?" "We managed to save your testicles" Our man breathes a big sigh of relief. "What's the bad news?" "They're under your pillow". [B][COLOR="Red"]___________________________________[/COLOR][/B] There once was a young holy roller, Had a boy friend attempt to console her. She'd gone down on his cock, That was hard as a rock... Chipped a tooth, plus she knocked out a molar. [/QUOTE]
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